News from the White House.. George Bush's wallet has gone missing already.

George Michael and Elton John are releasing a gay version of the Wizard of Oz. its called Swallow the Yellow thick load

George looked over the backyard fence and admired Fred's wife while she sunbathed topless. The next day, George corners his neighbour on the driveway saying, "I saw your wife sunbathing in the backyard without her top on yesterday." Fred was quite put out over the peeping incident and told George he planned revenge. That very evening, Fred noticed that George's bedroom shades were up. Upon closer inspection, he notices George's wife in the act of performing oral sex. The very next day Fred calls out to George, "Hey, George, I saw your wife giving you a blow-job last night." George replies, "Ha Ha Ha, Liar! I wasn't home last night..."

Crawford, Texas (Associated Press Release) - A tragic fire this morning destroyed the personal library of President George W. Bush. The fire began in the presidential bathroom where both of the books were kept. Both of his books have been lost. A presidential spokesman said the president was devastated, as he had almost finished colouring the second one.

Why do Liverpool goalkeepers never catch the ball? It's Scouse tradition never to touch something for long enough to leave fingerprints.

What is the big deal about Eva Mendes having sex in 50 states. That's the 3rd bush to go around fucking America.

How can we say that Americans haven't got a sense of humour?... I mean we all make sick jokes on this website but they shit on us...they voted the sickest joke ever into power...Twice!

An 18th-century vagabond in England, exhausted and famished, came to a roadside Inn with a sign reading: "George and the Dragon." He knocked. The Innkeeper's wife stuck her head out a window. "Could ye spare some victuals?" he asked. The woman glanced at his shabby, dirty clothes. "No!" she shouted. "Could I have a pint of ale?" "No!" she shouted. "Could I at least sleep in your stable?" "No!" she shouted again. The vagabond said, "might I please...?" "What now?" the woman screeched, not allowing him to finish. "De'ye suppose," he asked, "that I might have a word with George?"

What's the difference between Jesus and George Michael? George Michael can't use his hand as a glory hole.

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