Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest
Page 1 of 3 - Next Page
| A little girl runs to her father on her birthday and says, "Daddy, Daddy, guess how old I am today." Humouring her he says, "I don't know, honey, how old are you?" She replies, "I'm SIX!" "That's great! Go tell your uncle," he tells her. The girl runs into her uncle's room and again shouts, "Uncie, Uncie, guess how old I am today." He says "Ok, take off your knickers and I'll tell you." She does so and the uncle sticks his fingers in her, sniffs them, and says, "You're six today." She asks him, "How did you know that?" He replies, "I heard you talking to your dad." |    |
Joke by sickfuck, in Sex and shit > Incest - Tagged grandma , birthday , grandmother - Current Score: 240 - Added: 2 years, 1 month ago
| Me and my family buried my Grandma this morning... Her jokes just weren't good enough | |
Joke by Nobodys Hero, in Jokes with no home > Grandma - Tagged grandma , buried - Current Score: 209 - Added: 8 months ago
| Harry is visiting his grandma. She complains about the high cost of living. "When I was a girl, you could go out with a shilling and come back home with a dozen eggs, two pints of milk, a pound of bacon, half a pound of tea and a fresh chicken." "Yes," says Harry, "that's inflation for you." "It's nothing to do with inflation," says grandma, "it's all them fucking security cameras they have nowadays." | |
Joke by mickle, in Jokes with no home > Theft - Tagged old , shoplifting , grandma , relatives , terry wogan - Current Score: 177 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| A small boy goes into the kitchen one day and run up to his mum. "Mummy, mummy, Grandma's got a prawn between her legs!" "Pardon, darling?" "Grandma's got a prawn between her legs!" "Okay, show me." They both walk into the living room, where they find Grandma fast asleep and looking very pleased. Her knickers are missing and her skirt has ridden up so that nothing is left to the imagination. "See Mummy? A prawn," says the little boy, pointing between his Gran's splayed legs. "No, darling that's something special women have." "But Mummy," says the little boy, looking confused. "It tasted like a prawn." | |
Joke by sickfuck, in Sex and shit > Incest - Tagged oral , kid , fish , grandma - Current Score: 146 - Added: 2 years, 1 month ago
| I had a fairytale childhood. My Grandma was eaten by a wolf. | |
Joke by offended?, in Jokes with no home > Fairytale - Tagged grandma , childhood , wolf - Current Score: 141 - Added: 8 months ago
| I was talking to my grandma the other day and she told me we're directly related to Cherokee Indians. I have my reservations... | |
Joke by goonerphil, in Religion and racism > Indian - Tagged indians , grandma , reservations - Current Score: 101 - Added: 7 months ago
| Lulu was a prostitute but she didn't want her grandma to know. One day, the police raided a whole group of prostitutes at a sex party in a hotel and Lulu was among them. The police took them outside and had all the prostitutes lined up along the driveway when, suddenly, Lulu's grandma came by and saw her granddaughter. Grandma asked, "Why are you standing in line here, dear?" Not willing to let her grandmother know the truth, Lulu told her grandmother that the policemen were there passing out free oranges and she was just lining up for some. "Why, that's awfully nice of them. I think I'll get some for myself," and she proceeded to the back of the line. A policeman was going down the line asking for information from all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, he was bewildered and exclaimed, "Wow, still going at it at your age? How do you do it?" "I just take my dentures out, rip the skin back and suck them dry..." The policeman fainted. | |
Joke by ht, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged oranges , grandma , hooker - Current Score: 100 - Added: 2 years, 0 months ago
| When I was younger my Grandma used to rub lard into my Grandpa's back when he was ill. He went down hill fast after that | |
Joke by bobbydgg, in Jokes with no home > Grandma - Tagged grandma , grandpa , ill , lard - Current Score: 79 - Added: 1 year, 8 months ago
| Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When little Johnny received his plate, he started eating straight away. "Jonny, wait until we've said our prayer," his mother reminded him. "I don't have to," the little boy replied. "Of course you do," his mother insisted. "We say a prayer before eating at our house." "That's at our house," Johnny explained, "but this is Grandma's house and she knows how to cook." | |
Joke by stopher, in Jokes with no home > Grandma - Tagged grandma , prayer , jonny - Current Score: 68 - Added: 1 year, 7 months ago
| Three old mischievous grandmas were sitting on a bench outside a nursing home An old grandpa walked by, and one of the old grandmas yelled out saying, "We bet we can tell exactly how old you are" The old man said, "There ain't no way you can guess it, you old fools." One of the ornery grandmas said, "Sure we can! Just drop your under shorts and we can tell your exact age. Embarrassed just a little, he dropped his drawers. The grandmas stared at him for a while, asked him to turn around a couple of times, asked him to jump up and down for a little while and then they all piped up and said, "You're 91 years old!" "How in the world did you guess?" The ornery old grandmas snickered and laughed. Slapping their knees and grinning from ear to ear, all three happily yelled in unison, "Because we were at your birthday party yesterday !!!! | |
Joke by ht, in Celebrity and news events > Barack Obama - Tagged shit , old , grandma , dick - Current Score: 42 - Added: 1 year, 10 months ago
Page 1 of 3 - Next Page
Rhubarb spent 0.1ms doing 15 queries and 0.06s processing.
Sickipedia v2.75 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel