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| Trick or treat? Treat: you can suck my knob. Trick: turn around and I'll make it disappear. |    |
Joke by haha@you, in Jokes with no home > trick or treat - Tagged trick , treat , halloween , knob - Current Score: 1612 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| A couple were invited to a swanky family masked fancy dress Halloween party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed and there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, woke without pain and as it was still early decided go to the party. As her husband didn't know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when she was not with him. So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband in his costume, cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice "chick" he could and copping a little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife went up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his new partner high and dry and devoted his time to her. She let him go as far as he wished, naturally, since he was her husband. After more drinks he finally whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had passionate intercourse in the back seat. Just before unmasking at midnight she slipped away, went home, put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make up for his outrageous behavior. She was sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he had. "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there." Then she asked, "Did you dance much?" He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown and some other guys, so we went into the spare room and played poker all evening." "You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker all night!" she said with unashamed sarcasm. To which the husband replied, "Actually, I gave my costume to your Dad. Apparently he had the time of his life." | |
Joke by Mach, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged dad , wife , party , halloween , costume , genuine sick joke - Current Score: 222 - Added: 6 months, 15 days ago
| I've been invited to a Halloween fancy dress party this weekend. I've decided to go as a Muslim with a backpack. doesn't come much fucking scarier than that. does it? | |
Joke by geemack, in Jokes with no home > Halloween - Tagged backpack , muslim , bomb , halloween - Current Score: 166 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| I love Halloween. Its the only time I can wear my KKK outfit and get away with it. | |
Joke by baldlice, in Religion and racism > Ku Klux Klan - Tagged ghost , halloween , kkk - Current Score: 153 - Added: 1 month, 13 days ago
| Its coming to my favourite time of the year, Halloween. The only time I can dress up and play with kids without arousing suspicion. | |
Joke by danshand, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged halloween , children , paedophile - Current Score: 137 - Added: 2 months ago
| Went trick-or-treating last night. Every house I called at slammed the door back in my face. Maybe going as a Jehovah's Witness wasn't the best idea. | |
Joke by dragon35666, in Celebrity and news events > Halloween - Tagged halloween , trick or treat , jehovas witness - Current Score: 126 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| It won't be long now till we get the kids knocking on the door asking, "Trick or Treat?" It may not be a treat for them, but it will for me. | |
Joke by baldlice, in Sex and shit > Trick or Treat - Tagged treat , trick or treat , halloween , kids - Current Score: 72 - Added: 1 month, 25 days ago
| Wives and girlfriends of the England football team are to celebrate Halloween this Friday: it will be a classic case of going from Wags to Witches. | |
Joke by pornstar, in Celebrity and news events > Wags - Tagged wags , witch , england , halloween - Current Score: 63 - Added: 1 month, 7 days ago
| I've been invited to a Halloween party at a retirement home. I'm going as Harold Shipman. | |
Joke by nufcdude, in Illness and mortality > Old People - Tagged halloween , party , harold shipman - Current Score: 61 - Added: 2 months ago
| Halloween is a great time of year for me. I still buy the sweets but the kids come to me. | |
Joke by mboma, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged halloween , kids , sweets , paedophilia , paedophile , paedo , candy - Current Score: 35 - Added: 1 month, 24 days ago
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