Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest
Showing all jokes.
| A labourer applies for a job on a farm. The farmer asked him if he had experience and what he was particularly good at. The labourer gave him his CV and said that he could actually communicate with animals. The farmer wanted to test him and took him to the chicken shed. One of the hens clucked a few times and the labourer told the farmer that the hen took a dim view of him taking all 4 eggs off her that day. The farmer was amazed because that was exactly what he had done. They then went to the cow shed, where a cow mooed a couple of times. The labourer told the farmer that the cow had a sore front right-hand side teat on her udder. The farmer's mouth fell open because this was also true. The farmer said "You can start tomorrow if you want but I must warn you, the sheep are all lying bastards!" |    |
Joke by geebee, in Sex and shit > Bestiality - Tagged labour , farmer , hen - Current Score: 47 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| A Scotsman and an Englishman lived next door to each other. The Scotsman owned a hen and each morning he would look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast. One day he looked into his garden and saw that the hen had laid an egg in the Englishman's garden. He was about to go next door when he saw the Englishman pick up the egg. The Scotsman ran up to the Englishman and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The Englishman disagreed because the egg was laid on his property. They argued for a while until finally the Scotsman said, "In my family we normally solve disputes by the following actions: I kick you in the testicles and time how long it takes for you to get back up. Then you kick me in the testicles and time how long it takes for me to get up. Whoever gets up quicker wins the egg." The Englishman agreed to this and so the Scotsman put on the heaviest pair of boots he could find. He took a few steps back, then ran toward the Englishman and kicked him as hard as he could in the testicles. The Englishman fell to the floor clutching his groin, howling in agony for 30 minutes. Eventually the Englishman stood up and said, "Now it's my turn to kick you." The Scotsman smiled and said, "Ye can keep the damn egg!!" | |
Joke by jacko93, in Jokes with no home > Food - Tagged english , scot , testicles , egg , hen , argument - Current Score: 15 - Added: 10 months ago
Showing all jokes.
Server: Custurd in 0.14s using 4 queries. She's 0.98% angry.
Sickipedia v2.1 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel