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A bloke is wondering what would be a good anniversary preseant for his wife and thought maybe a true sign of their love would be to get her name tattoed on his cock.
So he went to the tattoo parlor and asked for his wife's name to be done: 'Wendy'. The tattoo artist told him that he needed to have an erection while he put it on. After an hour of excruciating pain, the tattoo was done.
On his way home from the tattoo parlor he needed a piss. He went to the loo and looked down to admire his tattoo and he noticed that, when he was not erect, the only letters that were visible were the W and the Y.
Suddenly, a big black bloke steps into the urinal beside him and pulls out his knob. He accidentally looked down at the guy and could not help but notice that he also had the letters W and Y tattooed.
"Hey, I guess you have a girlfriend or wife named Wendy too."
The guys looked confused and said, "what makes you think that?"
"Well I noticed the W and the Y tattoo - is your girlfriend named Wendy?"
The black guys laughed and responded, "no, man, that tattoo says, 'Welcome to Jamaica! Have a nice day'." |  |
A married couple were on holiday in Jamaica. They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such when they passed this small sandal shop. From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say, "You, foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop!"
So the couple walked in.
"I have some special sandals I think you would be interested in," the Jamaican said to them. "Dey make you wild at sex."
Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being the "sex god" that he was.
"How could sandals make you into a sex freak?" the husband asked the shopkeeper.
"Just try dem on, Mon," the Jamaican replied.
After some badgering from his wife, the man finally gave in and tried the sandals on. As soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his eyes ... something his wife hadn't seen in many years!
In the blink of an eye, the husband grabbed the Jamaican, quickly bent him over a table, yanked down his pants, ripped down his own pants, and grabbed a firm hold of the Jamaican's hips.
At which point the Jamaican began screaming...
"YOU GOT DEM ON DE WRONG FEET, MON! YOU GOT DEM ON DE WRONG FEET!" |  |
A guy is walking past a driveway and sees a Jamaican putting up a sign that reads "Boat for sale."
The man looks but all he can see is a caravan and a jeep. Confused he says to the Jamaican, "Where's the boat, all I see is a caravan and a jeep?"
"Yes, mon," replies the Jamaican, "and they're boat for sale!" |  |
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