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| A trucker who has been out on the road for two weeks stops at a brothel outside Atlanta. He walks straight up to the Madam, drops down $500 and says, "I want your ugliest woman and a grilled cheese sandwich!" The Madam is astonished. "But sir, for that kind of money you could have one of my finest ladies and a three-course meal." The trucker replies, "Listen Darlin, I ain't horny. I'm homesick." |    |
Joke by Desired Username, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged brothel , madam - Current Score: 74 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| A lady walks into a high class jewellery shop. She browses around and spots a beautiful diamond bracelet and walks over to inspect it. As she bends over to look more closely, she inadvertently breaks wind. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns around, her worst nightmare materialises in the form of a salesman standing right behind her. Cool as a cucumber and displaying complete professionalism, the salesman greets the lady with "Good day, Madam. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably, but hoping that the salesman may just not have been there at the time of her little "accident", she asks "Sir, what is the price of this lovely bracelet?" Copy Cat He answers," Madam, if you farted just looking at it, you are going to shit yourself when I tell you the price." | |
Joke by the phantom phucker, in Jokes with no home > Fart - Tagged lady , jewellery , diamond , fart , salesman , madam , accident , shit - Current Score: 37 - Added: 1 year ago
| Two elderly gentlemen, who had been without sex for several years, decided they needed to visit a whore house. When they arrived at the house, the Madam took one look at them and decided she wasn't going to waste any of her girls on these two old men. So she used "blow-up" dolls instead. She put a doll in each man's room and left them to their business. After the two men were finished, they started for home and got to talking. The first man said, "I think the girl I had was dead. She never moved, talked or groaned. How was it for you?" The second man replied, "I think mine was a witch." The first man asked, "How's that?" "Well," said the second man, "when I nibbled on her breast, she farted and flew out the window!" | |
Joke by the phantom phucker, in Sex and shit > Blow Up Doll - Tagged elderly , whorehouse , madam , blow-up doll , dead , witch , breast , fart - Current Score: 15 - Added: 1 year ago
| The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. "May I help you?" she asked. "I want to see Valerie," the man replied. "Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else," said the madam. "No. I must see Valerie," was the man's reply. Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills, gave them to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left. The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that none had ever come back two nights in a row - too expensive - and there were no discounts. The price was still $1,000. Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left. The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs. After their session, Valerie questioned the man. "No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?" she asked. The man replied, "South Carolina." "Really" she said. "I have family in South Carolina." "I know," the man said. "Your father died, and I am your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance." | |
Joke by welsh twat, in Jokes with no home > Law - Tagged madam , prostitution , man , ladies , money , inheritance - Current Score: 11 - Added: 4 months ago
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