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Browsing tag: madeleine
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What's the difference between Pope John Paul II and Maddie McCann?

The Pope died a virgin.
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Joke by cr3, in Celebrity and news events > Maddie - Tagged virgin , pope , madeleine mccann , maddie , madeleine  - Current Score: 1188 - Added: 1 year, 7 months ago

Jose Mourinho has said he wants to go back to Portugal and never be seen from or heard from again.

The McCanns have offered to help.
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Joke by Guest, in Celebrity and news events > Jose Mourinho - Tagged chelsea , mourinho , madeleine , madeleine mccann , maddie  - Current Score: 350 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago

Following the success of the West Yorkshire Police in finding Shannon Matthews, the Portuguese Police have gone back to the McCann's villa to look under the bed.I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by guest1, in Celebrity and news events > Shannon Matthews - Tagged maddie , madeleine , madeleine mccann , shannon matthews  - Current Score: 323 - Added: 10 months ago

Thank God for the "save maddie fund." The parents can afford a babysitter now.I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by RossMcG, in Celebrity and news events > Maddie - Tagged fund , madeleine , maddie , madeleine mccann , babysitter  - Current Score: 320 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago

After winning the Junior UK hide and seek championships, Shannon Matthews will now travel abroad to take on the current European Champion, Madeleine McCann.

Correction: the current European champion is in fact Anne Frank, who successfully hid for almost 5 years before being caught. Maddie has only been gone about 18 months. Besides, we all know she's buried in the woods.

Further correction: Anne Franks record was broken by Austrian Elisabeth Fritzl, who was hidden for 24 years.

But Elisabeth Fritzl was disqualified because she had help from her Dad.

Further Further Correction: I've been hiding me a child for 32 years! Fuck all of you!!!

Further Further Further Correction: Madeleine McCann also had help from her father, so why should miss Fritzl be disqualified?

Further Further Further Further Correction: Please stop being so disrespectful about innocent children. As a six year old, I am getting fed up of the constant jibes. The situation is now so dire that it has affected my career as a salt-distiller in my uncle's basement.
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Joke by Guest, in Celebrity and news events > Shannon Matthews - Tagged maddie , hide and seek , shannon matthews , champion , madeleine mccann , madeleine  - Current Score: 314 - Added: 10 months ago

What's pink and covered in cobwebs?

Madeleine McCann's bike.
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Joke by mess, in Celebrity and news events > Maddie - Tagged maddie , madeleine , bike , cobweb , madeleine mccann  - Current Score: 266 - Added: 8 months ago

What's the difference between Maddie McCann and Shannon Matthews?

People actually wanted Maddie to be found.
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Joke by The Wolf, in Celebrity and news events > Shannon Matthews - Tagged madeleine mccann , madeleine , shannon matthews , maddie , found  - Current Score: 244 - Added: 10 months ago

Spot the odd one out:

a) Olive Oil
b) Wine
c) Gold
d) Silver
e) Madeleine
f) Zinc

Answer: f. Zinc was never traded around the Mediterranean.
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Joke by Guest, in Celebrity and news events > Maddie - Tagged madeleine , traded , trade  - Current Score: 228 - Added: 10 months ago

Possible titles for the Maddie documentary coming out:

-Gone in 60 Minutes While We Were Having Lunch.
-The Never Ending News Story.
-Catch Me If You McCann.
-Live Freely on Charity Donations Or Another Toddler Will Have To Die Hard.
-Dude, Where's Our 'Cann?
-Everyone Knows What You Did Last Summer.
-Murat: Child kidnappings of Portugal for make benefit glorious tabloid of United Kingdom.
-The Ring
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Joke by masterimms, in Celebrity and news events > Maddie - Tagged maddie , madeleine mccann , madeleine , documentary  - Current Score: 222 - Added: 1 year ago

My perfect woman would have to be Kate McCann.

She's fit as fuck, works as a doctor, and if you get her up the duff you don't have to pay child support for too long.
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Joke by storyteller, in Celebrity and news events > Maddie And Shannon - Tagged kate mccann , maddie , madeleine , pregnancy , fit , sexy , gynaecologist too so she probably does girlongirl  - Current Score: 202 - Added: 2 months ago

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