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| Michael Jackson meets a young boy while walking around Neverland Ranch."would you like to see some magic",asks Michael."Sure",says the lad."Well for this trick you need to turn around,drop your pants and bend over",says Michael. So the lad turns around,drops his pants and bends over.Michael stands behind him and asks,"can you feel my finger going up your ass?"."I can",replies the lad. Michael then waves both hands in front of the lad and shouts "MAGIC"....... |    |
Joke by the phantom phucker, in Celebrity and news events > Michael Jackson - Tagged michael jackson , magic - Current Score: 182 - Added: 1 year ago
| Christmas time. Valium and wine. Children indulging in serious crime. With dad on the weed and mum high on crack. Christmas is magic when your family is black! | |
Joke by CUTTSY, in Religion and racism > Black - Tagged christmas , valium , crack , magic , black , cliff , cunting , richard - Current Score: 143 - Added: 10 months ago
| David Blaine today broke the world record for holding his breath on Oprah - 17 minutes and four seconds. Blaine has now frozen himself, he's starved himself, he's gone without sleep for weeks, and deprived himself of oxygen. Today, USA officials at Guantanamo Bay said, "See, it's not torture. It's magic." | |
Joke by mickle, in Celebrity and news events > guantanamo bay - Tagged david blaine , magic , torture , oprah , usa , cuba - Current Score: 86 - Added: 4 months, 27 days ago
| A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says, "You want to play 'Magic'?" She says, "What's that?" He says, "We go to my house and fuck, and then you disappear." | |
Joke by red-devil-nick, in Sex and shit > Singles - Tagged guy , girl , sex , magic , disapear - Current Score: 43 - Added: 10 months ago
| Slightly old joke but worth re telling... David Copperfield is at a "Corporate" do, he's impressing everyone with his card tricks, makes everyone go "wow" when he makes Claudia Schiffer dissappear and re appear etc etc ad infinitem. At the end of the act he gets a standing ovation, steps up to the microphone and asks the audience if anyone would like to show him a trick. One guys stands up and says "I know one". So David asks him to show the Audience. "Ok" says the guy "for this trick I need the assistance of the very lovely Claudia Schiffer" So claudia walks over to the guys table. "Please put your hands palm down on the table, and whatever happens don't move" he says, which she does. He then walks behind her, lifts up her dress, whips down her knickers, pulls his cock out and starts to hump her from behind. "Hey" says Copperfield after a couple of minutes, "That's not a trick" "No," says the man "But it is magic" | |
Joke by Sticky, in Celebrity and news events > Claudia Schiffer - Tagged claudia schiffer , david copperield , magic , sex - Current Score: 36 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| Can anyone beat my remarkable feat of endurance? I managed to show an interest in a David Blaine stunt for an amazing ten seconds. what a saddo for even watching a second of it :-) | |
Joke by Chalky, in Celebrity and news events > David Blaine - Tagged magic , stunt - Current Score: 20 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| "Hello Police? It's David Copperfield, My car's disappeared!" "Should I report it or clap, sir?" | |
Joke by Ixm, in Celebrity and news events > David Copperfield - Tagged david copperfield , magic , police - Current Score: 16 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| A guy goes into a pub and asks for '2 whiskeys, one for me and one for my mate' The landlord says 'is your mate coming in later?' The man says 'No, he is in my pocket' and pulls out a perfect little 6" high man. 'He can't drink whiskey' says the landlord. 'Yes he can' says the guy and the tiny man drinks the glass of whiskey. 'He can't even walk' says the landlord. The guy tells the little man to walk and he walks up and down on top of the bar. He can't even talk' says the landlord. 'Yes he can' says the guy. He says to the little man 'Tell him about the time you called that witch doctor a wanker' | |
Joke by redrobinson, in Jokes with no home > Accident - Tagged pub , bar , magic - Current Score: 15 - Added: 10 months ago
| One day while her husband is out working, a bored housewife decides to clean out the attic. While up there, she finds an antique mirror, which she decides would look good in the bed room. 30 minutes later, she's cleaning the mirror when she finds a hidden inscription saying: Magic mirror: speak in rhyme and a wish will be thine. Sure it is she thinks with a laugh. But never-the-less decides to try it. "Mirror Mirror in my hand, my breasts I wish to expand, the size I want is 44, please do not make them more." to her amazement, her breast start growing, and growing, and growing. Thinking that her husband will absolutely love her new assets, she decides to lay on the bed naked, and wait for him to come home. Upon arriving, he's is astounded by her new breast size! "Wow, how did this happen?!?" Happily, she re-counts the story of the magic mirror. Not to be outdone, her husband walks over to the mirror and rhymes: "Mirror Mirror on the wall, my dick is very small, if it could just touch the floor, I'd be happy evermore", suddenly his legs got shorter... and shorter... and shorter... | |
Joke by pdf1, in Jokes with no home > Magic - Tagged miror , magic , small dick - Current Score: 13 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| A Scotsman, Englishman and an Irishman find a wizard on the top of a tall cliff. The wizard orders them to jump off the cliff, but he also promises that if they say anything while falling, they will get it at the bottom of the cliff. So first, the Englishman jumps off the cliff and shouts, "Pillows!" and so he lands on some pillows. Then the Scotsman jumps off the cliff, and he shouts, "Hay!" and so he lands on some hay. Finally the Irishman runs to jump off the cliff, but he trips on a rock just before the jump and says, "Aw, shite!" | |
Joke by Ciabi, in Religion and racism > Irish - Tagged irish , scots , english , englishman , irishman , scotsman , scottish , jump , wizzard , pillows , pillow , hay , shit , shite , stupid , magic - Current Score: 10 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
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