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| A young man moved into a new apartment of his own, and went to the lobby to put his name on his mailbox. While there, an attractive young lady came out of the apartment next to the mailboxes, wearing a robe. The boy smiled at the young woman and she started a conversation with him. As they talked, her robe slipped open, and it was obvious that she had nothing else on. The poor kid broke into a sweat trying to maintain eye contact. After a few minutes, she placed her hand on his arm and said, "Let's go to my apartment, I hear someone coming." He followed her into her apartment; she closed the door and leaned against it, allowing her robe to fall off completely. Now nude, she purred at him, "What would you say is my best feature?" Flustered and embarrassed, he finally squeaked, "It's got to be your ears." Astounded, and a little hurt she asked, "My ears? Look at these breasts; they are full and 100% natural. I work out every day and my butt is firm and solid. Look at my skin - no blemishes anywhere. How can you think that the best part of my body is my ears?" Clearing his throat, he stammered ...."Outside, when you said you heard someone coming.?.....That was me." |    |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > ejaculation - Tagged new flat , mail , bathrobe - Current Score: 132 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| How do you know when a leper has sent you mail? His tongue is still on the stamp. | |
Joke by poosmellsyucky, in Illness and mortality > Leper - Tagged leper , mail , leprosy - Current Score: 51 - Added: 11 months ago
| A man was having an affair with another woman and his wife found out about it, so she told him, "if you don't end it now, I'm gonna go down town, to the post office where you work, and tell everyone I see that you're a no good, cheating, filthy bum." The husband replied, "you're gonna go down town, to the post office where I work, and tell everyone you see that I'm a no good, cheating, filthy bum?" She said, "yeah, that's right." The husband held out an envelope and said, "mail this." | |
Joke by slider1874, in Sex and shit > Adultery - Tagged affair , woman , sex , office , mail - Current Score: 49 - Added: 6 months ago
| I woke up this morning and there was a letter on the doormat saying "Please don't bend" I thought "How the fuck am I going to pick it up then?" | |
Joke by welshmadman, in Illness and mortality > A Man Was...... - Tagged lee mack , letter , post , man , house , mail , morning , early - Current Score: 20 - Added: 11 months ago
| My new bride arrived in the post today, and she was furious. I did tell her before the honeymoon, we could only afford one return ticket. | |
Joke by max the storyteller, in Sex and shit > Brides - Tagged bride , wife , mail - Current Score: 13 - Added: 1 month ago
| What's the difference between a nigger and mail? Mail can be returned to where it came from. | |
Joke by Grinko, in Religion and racism > Pakistani - Tagged nigger , mail - Current Score: 10 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| I'm married to a Taiwanese lady and people often ask me if she was a mail-order bride. I find this very insensitive. The Royal Mail lose around two million letters and parcels each year, to suggest that I would trust the delivery of my wife to them is insulting in the extreme. She was sent by DHL, next day delivery. | |
Joke by MICK THE MAG, in Religion and racism > Taiwanese - Tagged bride , dhl , mail , letters , parcels - Current Score: 8 - Added: 1 month ago
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