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| What's the difference between 9/11 and a cow? Americans don't know how to milk a cow! |    |
Joke by Conan, in Religion and racism > Americans - Tagged 9/11 , americans , america , cow , milk , 11/9 - Current Score: 241 - Added: 6 months, 14 days ago
| I was driving past my Gran's house today and saw 11 pints of milk on her doorstep. I thought, "she must be fucking thirsty today." | |
Joke by bawbag, in Illness and mortality > Dead - Tagged gran , milk , dead - Current Score: 168 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| "Flat tyre?" "Yeah." "What happened?" "Ran over a milk bottle." "Didn't see it?" "Damn kid had it under his coat." | |
Joke by ratboy, in Jokes with no home > Accident - Tagged milk , child , cruelty , bottle , car , driver , driving - Current Score: 117 - Added: 2 months, 16 days ago
| A blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 15 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 1.5 gallons, so he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to the door and the milkman said, "I found your note to leave 15 gallons of milk. Did you mean 15 gallons or 1.5 gallons?" The blonde said, "I want 15 gallons. I'm going to fill my bathtub up with milk and take a milk bath." The milkman asked, "Pasteurized?" The blonde said, "No. Just up to my tits." ------ BENNY HILL - ERNIE, THE FASTEST MILKMAN IN THE WEST | |
Joke by niggers out, in Sex and shit > Milkman - Tagged milk , milkman , tits , bath , ernie - Current Score: 84 - Added: 4 months, 14 days ago
| For thousands of years human beings have milked cows, and consumed the milk. It just makes you wonder- who actually discovered that cows could be milked- and what was he TRYING to do? | |
Joke by twayne, in Sex and shit > Bestiality - Tagged milk , cow , animal , sex , wank - Current Score: 42 - Added: 2 months, 14 days ago
| This blonde asks her milkman if he could leave one hundred pints of milk for her on the following morning. When the milkman asks why she needed one hundred pints, the blonde says, "I was reading in a magazine that bathing in milk helps to soften and reduce wrinkles on the skin, so I'd like to fill my bath up using the hundred pints." So the milkman asks, "Pastuerised?" And the blonde says, "No, just up to my tits will be fine." | |
Joke by pornstar, in Sex and shit > Tits - Tagged blonde , bath , milk , pastuerise , tits , pints - Current Score: 40 - Added: 2 months, 10 days ago
| What kind of bees make milk? Boobies | |
Joke by zauron, in Sex and shit > Tits - Tagged boobs , boobies , tits , bees , milk - Current Score: 33 - Added: 11 months ago
| In the middle of the harvesting, one of the farmhands had to obey the call of nature. He went to the edge of the field and started peeing. Most unfortunately, he was stung by a bee right on the "tip." The pain was unbearable, but he knew a piece of good advice. He went to the farmers house and put his penis in buttermilk. At that moment the farmers daughter came in. With her face red, she stood perfectly still looking at him. "Have you never seen one of these before?" the farmhand asked. To which the girl replied, "Yes, but this is the first time I see one being reloaded! | |
Joke by McLOVIN, in Sex and shit > Daughters - Tagged farm , bee , daughter , house , butter , milk , girl , pain - Current Score: 32 - Added: 7 months, 17 days ago
| A woman was breast feeding her baby, when she noticed the window cleaner watching her. Indignantly, she said, "what do you think you're staring at?" He replied, apologetically, "when I was a baby, I was bottle fed so I was just fascinated." The woman says, "well, baby's had enough but there's some left if you want to find out what it's like." The window cleaner climbed in through the window and started to feed. After a short time, the woman realised that she was becoming aroused and she asked, "would you like a little bit of some thing else?" He replied, "have you got a rusk?" | |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Breast Feeding - Tagged sam , breast , milk , rusk - Current Score: 32 - Added: 7 months, 8 days ago
| Why do cows look so depressed when being milked? Well if someone woke you up early, rubbed your tits for two hours and didnt shag you, you`d be pissed off too! | |
Joke by Lovelace, in Jokes with no home > Cows - Tagged tits , rub , milk - Current Score: 22 - Added: 10 months ago
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