Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest
Showing all jokes.
| One day in the future, OJ Simpson has a heart attack and dies. He immediately goes to hell, where the devil is waiting for him. I don't know what to do here," says the devil. "You are on my list, but I have no room for you. You definitely have to stay here, so I'll tell you what I'm going to do. I've got a couple of folks here who weren't quite as bad as you. I'll let one of them go, but you have to take their place. I'll even let YOU decide who leaves." OJ thought that sounded pretty good, so the devil opened the door to the first room. In it was Ted Kennedy and a large pool of water. Ted kept diving in, and surfacing, empty handed. Over, and over, and over he dove in and surfaced with nothing. Such was his fate in hell. "No," OJ said. "I don't think so. I'm not a good swimmer, and I don't think I could do that all day long." The devil led him to the door of the next room. In it was Al Gore with a sledgehammer and a room full of rocks. All he did was swing that hammer, time after time after time. "No, this is no good; I've got this problem with my shoulder. I would be in constant agony if all I could do was break rocks all day," commented OJ. The devil opened a third door. Through it, OJ saw Bill Clinton, lying on the bed, his arms tied over his head, and his legs restrained in a spread-eagle pose. Bent over him was Monica Lewinsky, doing what she does best. OJ looked at this in shocked disbelief, and finally said, "Yeah man, I can handle this." The devil smiled and said . . . "OK, Monica, you're free to go." |    |
Joke by ht, in Jokes with no home > Random - Tagged oj , monica , clinton , devil - Current Score: 54 - Added: 1 year ago
| Chelsea Clinton had been on a date so Hillary asked her if she had a good time. Chelsea said she had a wonderful time and thinks she's in love. Hillary said, "You didn't have sex, did you"? Chelsea said, "Not according to Dad." | |
Joke by exeter, in Celebrity and news events > Hillary Clinton - Tagged clinton , monica , chelsea , hillary , bill - Current Score: 21 - Added: 6 months, 22 days ago
| What do Monica and a Beverage machine have in common? Insert Bill Here. | |
Joke by lala1234, in Celebrity and news events > Bill Clinton - Tagged monica , beverage , bill , bill clinton - Current Score: 0 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| Hilary Clinton was taking a tour of a D.C. hospital while working to reform healthcare in the U.S. As she is touring, a doctor is explaining all the different functions of the hospital to her. Eventually, they pass an open room in the inpatient ward, where Hilary could clearly see a middle aged man masturbating with great enthusiasm. The doctor quickly instructed the floor nurse to close the door. It was too late, Hilary had already seen. She fiercely looked at the doctor and said, "What kind of hospital are you running here Doctor?" The doctor calmly explained that the man had a very rare ailment, which required him to ejaculate three times daily, or his testicles would swell and he would die. Hilary accepted the doctor's explanation and they moved on. A few minutes later, they came across another open room, yet this time they witnessed a nurse on her knees giving a different middle aged man oral sex. Hilary was outraged and called for an immediate explanation. "It's very simple Mrs. Clinton", said the doctor. "This man suffers from the same ailment as the last man, however he has a much better health plan." | |
Joke by eoghain616, in Jokes with no home > America - Tagged health care , monica - Current Score: -4 - Added: 3 weeks ago
Showing all jokes.
Custurd spent 0.16ms doing 6 queries and 0.01s processing. She's 2.07% angry.
Sickipedia v2.7 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel