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| I shat myself last night. I was having a beer in an airport bar when a paki rushed in screaming "allah, allah, allah, allah, allah......., alava coke and bag of nuts please. Stuttering Bastard!!!! |    |
Joke by ht, in Religion and racism > Suicide Bombers - Tagged paki , nuts , stutter - Current Score: 178 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| Winter is here and our native birds are finding food scarce. Please go to the pet shop and buy a mesh and a bag of nuts for our feathered friends. There is no finer sight on a winter's morning than a pair of tits around your nutbag! | |
Joke by lunchy bunsworth, in Sex and shit > Tits - Tagged tits , nuts - Current Score: 115 - Added: 1 week ago
| Lots of criticism at the moment is being targetted at "Lad's Mags" such as Zoo, Nuts and Loaded. People are saying they are immoral and degrading to women. Conservative MPs have even stated that they are willing to be interviewed in such magazines to elaborate on why they are a bad thing. But, trust me, that's not going to happen. You never see a cunt in a Lad's Mag. | |
Joke by twayne, in Sex and shit > camping - Tagged cunt , lads mag , conservatives , nuts , zoo - Current Score: 84 - Added: 3 months, 29 days ago
| A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only shorts made from Bubblewrap. The psychiatrist says, ''Well, I can clearly see you're nuts.'' | |
Joke by AS, in Illness and mortality > psychiatrist - Tagged psychiatrist , nuts , mad - Current Score: 74 - Added: 6 months, 15 days ago
| From a passenger ship, everyone can see a bearded man on a small island who is shouting and desperately waving his hands. "Who is it?" a passenger asks the captain. "I've no idea. Every year when we pass, he goes nuts." | |
Joke by paulie xixi, in Jokes with no home > Castaway - Tagged island , passenger , ship , nuts - Current Score: 61 - Added: 2 months, 3 days ago
| Apparently, small children can choke on nuts. In my experience, they gag on cock too. | |
Joke by Drunken Hobo, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged cock , children , nuts , gag , choke - Current Score: 38 - Added: 3 months, 18 days ago
| A little boy walks into an ice-cream shop wearing a cowboy hat and a pair of six-shooters. He asks the assistant for an ice-cream sundae. The assistant says, "do you want your nuts crushed?" The little boy whipped out his guns, pointed them at her and said, "do you want your tits shot off?" | |
Joke by Lovelace, in Jokes with no home > Ice Cream - Tagged cowboy , shopping , nuts , tits - Current Score: 29 - Added: 7 months, 22 days ago
| The sad life of a penis: I've only one eye, my hair's a mess, my relatives are nuts, my neighbour's an arsehole, my best friend's a cunt, and my owner's a wanker. | |
Joke by bendawson10, in Sex and shit > Penis - Tagged penis , dick , cunt , balls , nuts , arsehole , ass , wank , wanker - Current Score: 22 - Added: 5 months, 7 days ago
| An MP has said that lad mags such as Zoo and Nuts are "linked to social ills". Yeah, like short-sightedness, palm hair and repetitive strain injury. | |
Joke by bleary, in Sex and shit > Pornography - Tagged nuts , zoo , lad mags , wanking , rsi , hairy palms , if you dont stop it youll go blind - Current Score: 19 - Added: 3 months, 29 days ago
| If you have nuts on your wall what do you have? Walnuts. If you have nuts on your chest what do you have? Chestnuts. If you have nuts on your chin what do you have? A fucking big mouthful of cock. | |
Joke by WARMDUST, in Sex and shit > Balls - Tagged cock , balls , sucking , nuts - Current Score: 14 - Added: 5 months, 14 days ago
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