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| I read a book called "The Secret Life of Adolf Hitler." It told me things about him that I never knew. For instance, when Hitler was having sex he liked to piss on people. That put me right off him. |    |
Joke by offended?, in Sex and shit > Hitler - Tagged hitler , sex , pee - Current Score: 189 - Added: 7 months ago
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What's ten inches long, two inches wide, and starts with a p? A really good shit! | |
Joke by ht, in Sex and shit > Shit - Tagged shit , pee , 6 , inches - Current Score: 70 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| A little old lady is walking down the street, dragging two large plastic garbage bags with her, one in each hand. Unfortunately, there's a rip in one of the bags, and every once in a while a £20 note falls out onto the pavement. Noticing this, a policeman stops her. "Madam, there are £20 notes falling out of your bag." "Oh, really? Darn!" says the little old lady. "I'd better go back and see if I can collect them. Thanks for the warning!" "Well, now, not so fast," says the cop. "How did you get all that money? You didn't steal it, did you?" "Oh, no," says the little old lady. "You see, my backyard is right next to the parking lot of the football stadium. Each time there's a game, a lot of fans come and pee through the bushes, right into my flower beds! So, I go and stand behind the bushes with a big hedge clipper, and each time someone sticks his little thingy through the bushes, I say, '£20 or off it comes'!" "Well, that seems only fair." laughs the cop. "OK, good luck! By the way, what's in the other bag?" "Well", says the little old lady, "not everybody pays." | |
Joke by nassi, in Sex and shit > Penis - Tagged penis , hedgeclipper , football , pee - Current Score: 22 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the cocktails. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home. The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!' | |
Joke by prayforplagues19, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged women , night out , pee , piss , sex - Current Score: 13 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
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