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| I was out walking the dog this morning, when I spotted two teenagers wrestling with an old aged pensioner for her purse. I immediately ran over to help. We got the fucking thing off her in the end. |    |
Joke by cooperman, in Illness and mortality > Old people - Tagged help the aged , oap , pensioner , purse , teenage kicks - Current Score: 159 - Added: 7 months, 12 days ago
| An elderly gentleman had serious hearing problems for a number of years. He went to the doctor and the doctor was able to have him fitted for a set of hearing aids that allowed the gentleman to hear 100%. The elderly gentleman went back in a month to the doctor and the doctor said, Your hearing is perfect. Your family must be really pleased that you can hear again. The gentleman replied, Oh, I haven't told my family yet. I just sit around and listen to the conversations. I've changed my will three times! | |
Joke by niggers out, in Illness and mortality > Deafness - Tagged deaf , will , pensioner , doctor - Current Score: 65 - Added: 3 months, 27 days ago
| An elderly Pakistani man in an old folks home gets a visit from his family. "They treat us very well here, with respect," he said. "See over there that's Tom, he used to be a doctor and they still call him 'Dr. Tom'. And Bill over there used to be an airline pilot, they call him 'Capt. Bill'. "And me, I'm 90 years old and haven't had sex since I was 63, but they still call me 'That fucking Paki'." | |
Joke by how-low-can-you-get, in Religion and racism > Pakistani - Tagged paki , pensioner , old folks home , doctor , pilot - Current Score: 43 - Added: 2 months, 29 days ago
| What goes up and down and smells of piss? The lift in a retirement home. | |
Joke by Randall, in Jokes with no home > Pensioners - Tagged piss , pensioner , oap , retirement home - Current Score: 21 - Added: 1 year ago
| I went to buy my Grandmother a new walking stick from a Walking Stick Shop. Some old man was in there complaining to me that all the sticks are on high shelves. I said "You just can't get the staff these days" | |
Joke by SpikeyThePilot, in Illness and mortality > Old People - Tagged old , pensioner , stick - Current Score: 2 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| Why was the washing machine at the old folks' home laughing? 'Coz it was taking the piss out of the underwear. | |
Joke by BIRTHDAY DASTARD, in Illness and mortality > Incontinence - Tagged pensioner , piss , pants , washing machine , old - Current Score: -1 - Added: 1 year ago
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