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Browsing tag: phone
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The other day I needed to pay a visit to the public toliet, so I found a public toilet that had two cubicles.

One of the doors was locked. So I went into the other one, closed the door, dropped my trousers and sat down.

A voice came from the cubicle next to me: 'Hello mate, how are you doing?'

Although I thought that it was a bit strange, I didn't want to be rude, so I replied 'Not too bad thanks.'

After a short pause, I heard the voice again 'So, what are you up to?'

Again I answered, somewhat reluctantly, 'Just having a quick shit... How about yourself?'

The next thing I heard him say was "sorry mate, I'll have to call you back. I've got some cunt in the cubicle next to me answering everything I say.'
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Joke by johnboy, in Jokes with no home > true - Tagged toilet , crap , phone , toilet humour , gags , cunt  - Current Score: 1617 - Added: 6 months, 25 days ago

Barclay's are apparently "Fluent in Finance."

Well, that's fantastic. Its just a shame none of the fucking Indians that answer their phones are fluent in English.
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Joke by bizlop, in Religion and racism > Black - Tagged indian call centres , indians , pakis , wogs , call centre , bank , barclays , english , fluent , paki , phone , customer service  - Current Score: 952 - Added: 4 months ago

I've been saving a fortune lately. Instead of spending a fortune ringing expensive sex lines, I ring the Samaritans and say, "talk dirty or I'll kill myself!"I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by FELTCHGIBBON, in Sex and shit > Phone Sex - Tagged sex , phone , dirty , samaritans  - Current Score: 211 - Added: 2 weeks ago

I don't agree with Vodafone's advertising campaign.

It states "Be part of the worlds largest mobile community"

Now correct me if I'm wrong but that's the Gypsies!
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Joke by welshmadman, in Religion and racism > Gypsy - Tagged jimmy carr , vodafone , gypsy , dirty , mobile community , phone , pikey , cunt , scum , sick  - Current Score: 181 - Added: 11 months ago

Women have it easy these days. They can get sex whenever they want.

Any women who disagree with this, call me on 0792 191 2527 (London) and I'll prove it.
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Joke by albinobob123, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged phone , sex , women , london  - Current Score: 139 - Added: 3 months ago

All that phone sex has caught up with me...

I have hearing-aids
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Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Phone Sex - Tagged phone , sex , phone sex , aids , hearing  - Current Score: 118 - Added: 11 months ago

Emily Sue passed away and Bubba called 911.
The 911 operator told Bubba that she would send someone out right away.
"Where do you live?" asked the operator.
Bubba replied, "At the end of Eucalyptus Drive."
The operator asked, "Can you spell that for me?"
There was a long pause and finally Bubba said, "How 'bout if I drag her over to Oak Street and you pick her up there?"
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Joke by bastowbastow, in Jokes with no home > Unfunny Jokes Written By Americans - Tagged phone  - Current Score: 107 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago

How do you make your girlfriend cry during sex?

Phone her up
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Joke by mycockisbiggerthanyours, in Sex and shit > Balls - Tagged sex , girlfriend , cry , cheating , phone , white bastards  - Current Score: 94 - Added: 9 months ago

West Midlands police are looking for a "racist attacker". I phoned the information line but apparently its not a job advertisment!I like this! This is poor. Edit this
Joke by sw3llh34d, in Religion and racism > Racism - Tagged police , racist , phone  - Current Score: 85 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago

Don't bother wasting money on subscribing to expensive adult web sites or calling 0898 phone numbers.

Just phone your local department store and ask them to describe their latest selection of ladies' lingerie, while masturbating furiously.
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Joke by munkybars, in Sex and shit > Wanking - Tagged furiously , lingerie , department , phone , expensive  - Current Score: 71 - Added: 1 month, 26 days ago

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