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| Give a man a fish, you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish.(ricky gervais) |    |
Joke by JKSLYR, in Religion and racism > Prayer - Tagged prayer , religion - Current Score: 131 - Added: 11 months ago
| Everyone was seated around the table as the food was being served. When little Johnny received his plate, he started eating straight away. "Jonny, wait until we've said our prayer," his mother reminded him. "I don't have to," the little boy replied. "Of course you do," his mother insisted. "We say a prayer before eating at our house." "That's at our house," Johnny explained, "but this is Grandma's house and she knows how to cook." | |
Joke by stopher, in Jokes with no home > Grandma - Tagged jonny , grandma , prayer - Current Score: 54 - Added: 11 months ago
| The Paki's Prayer.... Our Father who art in Bradford, Patel be thy name, Thy curry come, Thy stinging bum, On earth as it is in Rochdale, Give us this day our daily naan, And forgive us our smell, And help those that hold our smell against us, For thine is the prayer mat, The Nissan Almera, For ever & ever, AHMED | |
Joke by staffer, in Religion and racism > Pakistani - Tagged almera , naan , prayer , curry , ahmed - Current Score: 35 - Added: 3 months, 23 days ago
| What do you call a question that you don't expect an answer to? A Prayer | |
Joke by whogivesashit, in Religion and racism > God - Tagged rhetorical , question , prayer , religion , arsehole - Current Score: 32 - Added: 2 months ago
| The Mans Prayer Lord, before I lay down to sleep today, I pray for a woman whos partially gay, One whos pretty, sexy and bright, One whos fanny is small and tight, Oh send me a woman who goes like a train, Who swallows your load and wants it again! And asIi pray with this in mind, She'd ask me to take her from behind! And when I was done, I'd climb off and thank her, Until you can find her, I'll just be a wanker! Amen. | |
Joke by Guest, in Religion and racism > Christianity - Tagged prayer , perfect woman , wanker - Current Score: 23 - Added: 7 months ago
| A black guy goes into a church and finds the vicar. ''Father!'' he says. ''I need you to pray for my hearing.'' ''Certainly my child,'' the vicar replies. So he puts one hand on top the black guys head, and a finger in his ear. After about 3 minutes of hard prayers, the vicar takes his hand off and his finger out. ''How is your hearing now my child?'' the vicar asks. ''Well I don't know,'' black guy says. ''It's not till next week!'' | |
Joke by bighairybollocks, in Religion and racism > Prayer - Tagged vicar , black , hearing , court , prayer - Current Score: 22 - Added: 3 months ago
| Beer Prayer Our lager, Which art in barrels, Hallowed be thy drink. Thy will be drunk, (I will be drunk), At home as it is in the pub. Give us this day our foamy head, And forgive us our spillages, As we forgive those who spill against us. And lead us not to incarceration, But deliver us from hangovers. For ever and ever. Bar-men | |
Joke by cillers, in Religion and racism > Prayer - Tagged beer , prayer , barmen , bar , drink , drunk - Current Score: 4 - Added: 4 weeks ago
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