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| They say prostitution is the oldest profession. That's bullshit. ...how could men have paid for sex if they didn't have jobs? |    |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged prostitution , hookers , feminists - Current Score: 76 - Added: 8 months, 28 days ago
| In the news, prostitute users are to face a legal clampdown. Fucking great, I usually have to pay extras for that. | |
Joke by itchyanus, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged prostitution , prostitute - Current Score: 69 - Added: 3 days ago
| One day a hooker went to file her taxes, and for occupation she put prostitution. The tax collector explained that prostitution was an illegal occupation. She said she'd have to go home and think about it and that she'd call him back in a hour with her occupation. An hour later she called him and said, "I've got it... I'm a chicken farmer." He said, "How do you get chicken farmer out of prostitution." She said, "I raised over a thousand cocks last year." | |
Joke by mediator, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged prostitution , tax - Current Score: 40 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| Commons Leader Harriet Harman says she wants to abolish Prostitution. Shame, my Mum was really getting in to it. | |
Joke by The Wolf, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged harriet harman , prostitution - Current Score: 36 - Added: 11 months ago
| A man is driving down a deserted stretch of highway when he notices a sign out of the corner of his eye. It reads: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 10 MILES He thinks it was just a figment of his imagination and drives on without a second thought. Soon, he sees another sign which says SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION 5 MILES Suddenly, he begins to realize that these signs are for real. Then he drives past a third sign saying: SISTERS OF ST, FRANCIS HOUSE OF PROSTITUTION NEXT RIGHT His curiosity gets the best of him and he pulls into the drive. On the far side of the parking lot is a sombre stone building with a small sign next to the door reading: SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS He climbs the steps and rings the bell. The door is answered by a nun in a long black habit who asks, What may we do for you, my son He answers, I saw your signs along the highway, and was interested in possibly doing business. Very well, my son. Please follow me. He is led through many winding passages and is soon quite disoriented. The nun stops at a closed door, and tells the man, Please knock on this door. He does as he is told and this door is answered by another nun in a long habit, holding a tin cup. This nun instructs, Please place $50 in the cup, then go through the large wooden door at the end of this hallway. He gets $50 out of his wallet and places it in the second nuns cup. He trots eagerly down the hall and slips through the door, pulling it shut behind him. As the door locks behind him, he finds himself back in the parking lot, facing another small sign: GO IN PEACE YOU HAVE JUST BEEN SCREWED BY THE SISTERS OF ST. FRANCIS | |
Joke by niggers out, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged screwed , nuns , prostitution , whore , slapper - Current Score: 31 - Added: 9 months ago
| My neighbour's been doing a bit of work in her garden today... Good views for me...she's a prostitute. | |
Joke by Aspen, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged prostitution , voyeur - Current Score: 28 - Added: 3 months ago
| Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realise that it bears a very close resemblance to the first. | |
Joke by staffer, in Jokes with no home > Politics - Tagged politics , oldest , screwing people for money , prostitution - Current Score: 17 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| I can't understand people who say that prostitution is the oldest profession. Who the fuck do they think built their houses? | |
Joke by ReigatePen, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged prostitution , prostitute , work - Current Score: 16 - Added: 1 month ago
| The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. "May I help you?" she asked. "I want to see Valerie," the man replied. "Sir, Valerie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else," said the madam. "No. I must see Valerie," was the man's reply. Just then, Valerie appeared and announced to the man that she charged $1,000 a visit. Without hesitation, the man pulled out ten one-hundred dollar bills, gave them to Valerie, and they went upstairs. After an hour, the man calmly left. The next night, the same man appeared again, demanding to see Valerie. Valerie explained that none had ever come back two nights in a row - too expensive - and there were no discounts. The price was still $1,000. Again the man pulled out the money, gave it to Valerie and they went upstairs. After an hour, he left. The following night the man was there again. Everyone was astounded that he had come for the third consecutive night, but he paid Valerie and they went upstairs. After their session, Valerie questioned the man. "No one has ever been with me three nights in a row. Where are you from?" she asked. The man replied, "South Carolina." "Really" she said. "I have family in South Carolina." "I know," the man said. "Your father died, and I am your sister's attorney. She asked me to give you your $3,000 inheritance." | |
Joke by welsh twat, in Jokes with no home > Law - Tagged madam , prostitution , man , ladies , money , inheritance - Current Score: 11 - Added: 4 months ago
| What do you call a prostitute with a dick in each ear? Anything you like, she can't hear you. | |
Joke by Steve Maurice, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged cheesy , prostitution , hooker - Current Score: 3 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
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