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| I went out on the piss last night and pulled a georgeous bird. We made love several times before falling asleep in each others arms. When I woke up though I had the shock of my life. She had put on 5 stone during the night. |    |
Joke by justincider, in Sex and shit > Fat - Tagged piss , pulled , bird , georgeous , sex , made love , weight - Current Score: 58 - Added: 3 months ago
| Late one Friday night a policeman spotted a man driving very erratically through the streets of Dublin. He pulled the man over and asked him if he had been drinking that evening. "Aye, so I have. 'Tis Friday, you know, so me and the lads stopped by the pub where I had six or seven pints. And then there was something called "Happy Hour" and they served these mar-gar-itos which are quite good. I had four or five o' those. Then I had to drive me friend Mike home and O' course I had to go in for a couple of Guiness - couldn't be rude, ye know. Then I stopped on the way home to get another bottle for later ..." And the man fumbled around in his coat until he located his bottle of whiskey, which he held up for inspection. The officer sighed, and said, "Sir, I'm afraid I'll need you to step out of the car and take a breathalyzer test." Indignantly, the man said, "Why? Don't ye believe me?" | |
Joke by buzz-lightyear, in Jokes with no home > Police - Tagged police , drinking , drunk , pulled - Current Score: 54 - Added: 6 months ago
| I pulled a girl at a nightclub and she took me back to her place. I was really drunk but I still managed to fuck her. While we were fucking I said to her, "you've got no tits but your fanny is so tight." She said, "get off of my fucking back." | |
Joke by justincider, in Sex and shit > Fuck - Tagged girl , pulled , nightclub , drunk , fucking , tits , tight , fanny - Current Score: 28 - Added: 2 months ago
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