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| Ralph came home drunk one night, slid into bed beside his sleeping wife, and fell into a deep slumber. He awoke before the Pearly Gates where St.Peter said, "You died in your sleep, Ralph." Ralph was stunned. "I'm dead? No, I can't be! I've got too much to live for. Send me back!" St. Peter said, "I'm sorry, but there's only one way you can go back, and that is as a chicken." Ralph was devastated, but begged St. Peter to send him to a farm near his home. The next thing he knew, he was covered with feathers, clucking, and pecking the ground. A rooster strolled past. "So, you're the new hen, huh? How's your first day here?" "Not bad," replied Ralph the hen, "but I have this strange feeling inside. Like I'm gonna explode!" "You're ovulating," explained the rooster. "Don't tell me you've never laid an egg before." "Never," said Ralph. "Well, just relax and let it happen," says the rooster. "It's no big deal." Ralph did, and a few uncomfortable seconds later, out popped an egg! Ralph was overcome with emotion as he experienced motherhood. He soon laid another egg -- his joy was overwhelming. As he was about to lay his third egg, he felt a smack on the back of his head, and heard his wife shout, "Dammit, Ralph! Wake up. You're shitting in the bed!" |    |
Joke by redrobinson, in Jokes with no home > Drinking Jokes - Tagged drunk , chickens , egg , reincarnation - Current Score: 218 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| I joined the U.K Reincarnation Society this week; it cost me £500 for membership. But in the end thought, ''Ah fuck it, you only live once'' | |
Joke by bighairybollocks, in Religion and racism > Religion - Tagged reincarnation - Current Score: 140 - Added: 4 days ago
| I was talking to my wife the other day about reincarnation. She asked "what actually is reincarnation?" I said to her, "well, its when you die and come back as something completely different." "So, I could come back as a pig?!" she exclaimed I said, "you're not listening are you.....?" | |
Joke by staffer, in Jokes with no home > Riencarnation - Tagged listening , pig , reincarnation , wife , die - Current Score: 72 - Added: 3 months, 30 days ago
| I've heard that reincarnation is making a comeback | |
Joke by appy2be, in Jokes with no home > riencarnation - Tagged reincarnation , jesus - Current Score: 7 - Added: 7 months, 27 days ago
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