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| A guy is walking along the strip in Las Vegas and a knockout-looking Vegas hooker catches his eye. He strikes up a conversation and eventually asks the hooker, "how much do you charge?" The hooker replies, "it starts at $500 for a hand-job." The guy says, "$500 dollars! For a hand-job! Holy crap! No hand-job is worth that kind of money!" The hooker says, "Do you see that Denny's on the corner?" "Yes." "Do you see the Denny's about a block further down?" "Yes." "And beyond that, do you see that third Denny's?" "Yes." "Well," says the hooker, smiling invitingly, "I own those. And, I own them because I give a hand-job that's worth $500." The guy says, "what the hell? You only live once. I'll give it a try." They retire to a nearby motel. A short time later, the guy is sitting on the bed realizing he just experienced the hand-job of a lifetime, worth every bit of $500. He is so amazed, he says, "I suppose a blow-job is $1,000?" The hooker replies, "$1,500." "I wouldn't pay that for a blow-job!" The hooker replies, "step over here to the window, big boy. Do you see that casino just across the street? I own that casino outright. And I own it because I give a blow-job that's worth every cent of $1,500." The guy, basking in the afterglow of that terrific hand-job, decides to put off the new car for another year or so, and says, "Sign me up." Ten minutes later, he is sitting on the bed more amazed than before. He can scarcely believe it, but he feels he truly got his money's worth. He decides to dip into the retirement savings for one glorious and unforgettable experience. He asks the hooker, "How much for some pussy?" The hooker says, "come over here to the window, I want to show you something. Do you see how the whole city of Las Vegas is laid out before us, all those beautiful lights, gambling palaces, and show places?" "Damn!" the guy says, in awe, "you own the whole city?" "No," the hooker replies, "but I would if I had a pussy!" |    |
Joke by Weetobix, in Sex and shit > Prostitution - Tagged prostitute , porsche , rolex - Current Score: 127 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| I bought a new dog yesterday. I've named him Rolex.......he's a watchdog | |
Joke by pornstar, in Jokes with no home > Dog - Tagged rolex , dog , watchdog - Current Score: 49 - Added: 4 months, 22 days ago
| A guy saw an advert in the paper, "Porsche for Sale." Deciding he had nothing to lose, he phoned the number, and was told to call round to a lady's house immediately. He saw the car - it was beautiful! Almost new, and all the luxury trimmings. The guy was impressed, and asked, "how much?" The woman looked at him and said, "50 should cover it." The man said, "thanks but no, 50 000 Pounds is much more than I can afford." "No-no, the woman said - I meant 50 Pounds - but if that's no good, how does 50p sound?" The guy, amazed, handed over 50p and was given all the documents - the car was totally legit. He couldn't resist asking, though, why she was selling it for such a daft ammount. "Well," the woman replied, "it was my husband's car. He recently left me to live with his young secretary - his lawyers wrote to me this morning ordering that I sell all his stuff and send him the money. Now, are you interested in buyng a rolex... How does 20p sound?" | |
Joke by bizlop, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged money , sex , rolex , divorce , porsche - Current Score: 5 - Added: 6 months, 29 days ago
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