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| What do Michael Jackson and Santa Claus have in common? They both leave little boys' bedrooms with empty sacks. |    |
Joke by ht, in Celebrity and news events > Michael Jackson - Tagged michael jackson , jacko , santa claus , sack - Current Score: 446 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| I learnt to swim at a very early age. When I was three my parents used to row me out to sea in a little boat until they got about a mile or so away from the shore - then I had to swim back. I quite liked the swim - it was getting out of the sack that was difficult. | |
Joke by hjw5774, in Jokes with no home > Swimming - Tagged swimming , sack , drowning - Current Score: 116 - Added: 3 months, 9 days ago
| The BBC won't sack Jonathan Ross. He's too important. Nobody ranks higher than him. But he can't say that. | |
Joke by Boogaloo, in Celebrity and news events > Jonathan Ross - Tagged bbc , jonathan ross , wank , sack - Current Score: 112 - Added: 4 weeks ago
| A man who is friends with the manager at the local zoo is called into the managers office. "I need to ask you a favour" he says. "There's a school group coming tomorrow especially to see the silverback gorilla but he died earlier today. What I want you to do is dress up in a gorilla suit and pose as the gorilla to avoid disappointment." "No problem" says the man. "This should be fun." The next day he is in the enclosure nice and early in his gorilla suit clowning around and trying to act like any real gorilla would. The children arrive and he starts to act up for them and they all start to laugh at him. He starts to swing on the rope swing and gets quite a good reception. This encourages him a bit too much and he gets over confident and goes too high. He falls off in mid air and lands straight in the lion cage. Surrounded by lions and scared he takes the head of his suit off and screams "Help, help, I'm not really a gorilla." One lion moves closer to him and whispers. "shut the hell up or you'll get us all sacked." | |
Joke by superhorse, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged zoo , gorilla , clown , animals , loon , sack - Current Score: 48 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| Why is Santa's sack so full? Because he only comes once a year! | |
Joke by ag, in Jokes with no home > Santa - Tagged santa , cum , scrotum , sack - Current Score: 35 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| I got sacked from work the other day for being caught on the loo for an hour and a half on CCTV. I tried explaining to the boss that, if he had what I had, then he would also be on the loo for one and a half hours too. He said, "what have you got?" I said, "The Daily Star, News of the World, and the Guardian." | |
Joke by murphy, in Illness and mortality > Diarrhea - Tagged sack , work , boss , jobs - Current Score: 27 - Added: 4 months, 19 days ago
| I tried to get my pervy postman fired because he kept wanking through my letterbox. He got away with it though, "deliver contents of sack" was actually in his job description. | |
Joke by BruceWillis, in Sex and shit > Wanking - Tagged postman , wanking , deliver , sack , job description - Current Score: 17 - Added: 1 month, 15 days ago
| When I was a child I got a Saturday job helping the local milkman who also happened to be the local Paedophile. I got the sack on the first day. | |
Joke by el.hannen, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged sack - Current Score: 17 - Added: 4 days ago
| My boss has threatened to give me the sack for being on Sickipedia too long... I usually only have to swallow the first few inches | |
Joke by bawbag, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged sack , anal , sickipedia - Current Score: 13 - Added: 3 months, 19 days ago
| Mummy. Mummy are you sure this is how to learn to swim? Shut up and get back in the sack! | |
Joke by jazza l s, in Jokes with no home > Mummy, Mummy - Tagged mummy mummy , swimming , sack - Current Score: 12 - Added: 5 months, 19 days ago
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