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| A farmer buys a young rooster to impregnate his chickens. The young rooster struts into the barn and yells to the old rooster, “Get out, old man! This is my barn now!” “Tell you what,” says the old rooster. “I’ll race you around the farm; winner gets all the chicks.” The old rooster takes off toward the front of the house with the young rooster chasing him. The farmer takes one look at the roosters, pulls out his shotgun, and blows the young one away. “Darn it,” says the farmer. “That’s the third gay rooster I’ve bought this month!” |    |
Joke by McLOVIN, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged chickens , gay , man , farmer , shotgun , young , house , rooster - Current Score: 181 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| What's got 100 balls and fucks ducks? A twelve bore shotgun | |
Joke by sick puppy, in Jokes with no home > Scatalogical - Tagged one liners , twelve bore , fucks , shotgun , duck - Current Score: 56 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| A woman awakes during the night to find that her husband was not in their bed. She puts on her robe and goes downstairs to look for him and finds him sitting at the kitchen table with a hot cup of coffee in front of him. He appears to be in deep thought, just staring at the wall. She watches as he wiped a tear from his eye and takes a sip of his coffee. "What's the matter, dear?" she whispers as she steps into the room. "Why are you down here at this time of night?" The husband looks up from is coffee, "do you remember 20 years ago when we were dating, and you were only 16?", he asks solemnly. The wife is touched to tears thinking that her husband is so caring and sensitive. "Yes, I do," she replies. The husband paused. The words were not coming easily. "Do you remember when your father caught us in the back seat of my car making love?" "Yes, I remember," said his wife, lowering herself into a chair beside him. The husband continued, "do you remember when he shoved the shotgun in my face and said, 'either you marry my daughter or I will send you to jail for 20 years?" "I remember that, too," she replied softly. He wiped another tear from his cheek and said, "I would have gotten out today." | |
Joke by pluvius, in Jokes with no home > Marriage - Tagged shotgun , wedding , jail - Current Score: 49 - Added: 5 months, 27 days ago
| There once was a farmer who had three daughters who were all going out on their first dates on the same night. The farmer, being protective of his daughters, decides to meet their suiters at the front door with a shotgun. The first date comes to the door and the father opens up and the lad says "Hi my name's Joe, I'm here for Flo. We're going to the show. Is she ready to go?" The father looks the guy over and sends the kids off on their date. Next lad arrives "My name's Eddie, I'm here for Betty. We're going to get some spaghetti. Is she ready?" The father felt this bloke was okay too so off the kids went. The final young man arrives and rings the bell and the farmer opens up. The boy started off "Hi my name's Chuck" And the farmer shot him. | |
Joke by pornstar, in Jokes with no home > Dating - Tagged farmet , shotgun , betty , eddie , chuck , date , shot , spaghetti , show , flow , joe - Current Score: 47 - Added: 4 months, 5 days ago
| Paddy decided to rob a bank. He got all the gear together - stocking mask, sawn-off shotgun, getaway car and so on - but he realised his accent would mark him out as Irish, so he took elocution lessons for almost a year until he could finally pass as an Englishman. On the day of the robbery, he donned his mask, rushed into the bank and said, "I say there, I'm terribly sorry but this is a robbery. Be a good chap and fill this sack with lots of lovely lolly." The cashier said, "you're Irish aren't you?" Paddy was astonished. "How the divil did ye figure dat out?" he asked. The cashier replied, "it was easy, you've sawn the wrong end off your shotgun!" | |
Joke by gonad, in Religion and racism > Irish - Tagged paddy , irish , elocution , shotgun - Current Score: 38 - Added: 8 months, 21 days ago
| My next door neighbour is a real goer. She's been cocked more times than Elmur Fud's shotgun! | |
Joke by bawbag, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged neighbour , elmur , fud , shotgun - Current Score: 12 - Added: 3 months, 18 days ago
| What's got two hundred balls and fucks rabbits? A double barreled shotgun. | |
Joke by D dude, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged rabbit , shotgun , fuck - Current Score: 8 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| I found out today that my marriage isn't legitimate... As her dad didn't have a license for that shotgun. | |
Joke by Gunners, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged wife , shotgun , wedding - Current Score: 7 - Added: 1 month, 25 days ago
Fatt got buried to -6. Reveal Joke
chuff muncher got buried to -7. Reveal Joke
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