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| My girlfriend said she wanted to make me happy in the bedroom. So now the bedroom has Sky Sports, a fridge full of beer and she sleeps on the couch. |    |
Joke by blue--ink, in Sex and shit > Girlfriend - Tagged girlfriend , sex , sky , sports , fridge , beer - Current Score: 93 - Added: 1 month ago
| Sky TV has announced they have abandoned the idea of advertising their television programs on Sikipedia after the word 'DUPLICATE' seemed to appear at the end of every listing. | |
Joke by staffer, in Jokes with no home > Television - Tagged sky , tv , duplicate , advertising , sickipedia , appeared - Current Score: 34 - Added: 1 month ago
| Sherlock Holmes, the great detective, and his faithful companion, Dr. Watson, go on holiday in the south of France, camping. On the first night, Holmes nudges Watson in his sleeping bag, and wakes him. "Tell me, Watson, when you look up at the stars, what do you see? What does the night sky tell you?" Thinking it to be some kind of riddle, or personality test, Watson thinks for a moment, before answering. "Meteorologically, the sky tells me it is a clear, cloudless night, and the weather will be fine for the next day. Astronomically, Venus has entered the House of the Moon, while Astrologically, it appears that Capricorns should not attempt any personal upheaval this month, but Sagittariuses can expect a windfall to come their way. Religiously, it tells me that the Lord has worked long and hard to create the best world he can, and philosophically it makes me feel very small in a massive universe." At this, he turned to Holmes and smiled, saying "What does it tell you?" "It tells me, my dear Watson, that some swine has pinched our tent!" | |
Joke by FengShuiNinja, in Jokes with no home > Sherlock Holmes - Tagged sherlock holmes , dr watson , camping , sky , meteorology , astology , astronomy , religion , philosophy , theft , fsn - Current Score: 19 - Added: 10 months ago
| Three hot meals a day... Comfy beds.... Sky TV.... Playstation.... Out early for "good behaviour"... Carlsberg don't do jail sentences..... oh, wait... yeah they do... | |
Joke by bollocktwat, in Jokes with no home > Jail - Tagged jail , carlsberg , playstation , sky , good behaviour - Current Score: 17 - Added: 3 weeks ago
| I was walking down the beach with my blonde girlfriend the other day when I said, "hey look at that dead bird." She looked to the sky and said, "where?" | |
Joke by red-devil-nick, in Religion and racism > Blondes - Tagged blonde , bird , sky - Current Score: 14 - Added: 8 months ago
| Sky have won the rights to the World Origami Championship. Unfortunately it's only on paper view. | |
Joke by mickle, in Celebrity and news events > origami - Tagged paper , sky , tv - Current Score: 11 - Added: 11 months ago
| What's the similarity between skydiving, and getting a blow job off your granny? Don't look down! | |
Joke by Geoff the Clownfish, in Illness and mortality > Old people - Tagged skydiving , blow job , granny , look , down , incest , sky , diving - Current Score: 3 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
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