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| A psychology student is conducting a survey to study the masturbatory habits of males. She approaches the first man and says, "Excuse me, sir, I'm conducting a survey and would like to know, what do you hold in your left hand while you masturbate?" To which the man replies, "A remote controller, for the DVD". She then approaches the second man, with the same question. He answers, "I've got a magazine", and she notes down his answer. She then approaches a third man and asks him what he holds while he masturbates, to which he answers, "A bar of soap". Bemused by this, she asks why. "I'm bathing the kids." |    |
Joke by caliban, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged paedophile , paedophilia , paedo , wank , masturbate , wanking , kids , kid , children , bath , bathing , soap , magazine , porn , hand , tv , dvd , remote , survey - Current Score: 349 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| I got home tonight to discover thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards. | |
Joke by Gash TL, in Jokes with no home > Burglar - Tagged thieves , housebreak , dirty bastards , soap , shower gel , towels - Current Score: 188 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| What is the difference between a bar of soap and a Jew? A bar of soap lasts longer than one shower. | |
Joke by marcusa458, in Religion and racism > Aborigines - Tagged jew , nazi , hitler , jewish , religion , germany , shower , soap - Current Score: 56 - Added: 6 months, 30 days ago
| There was a church with nuns and monks living in it but they were not allowed to go near each other or speak to each other. One day 4 monks went to have a shower and after they had stripped off they found there was no soap so one brave monk said that he would go and take some from the nuns quarters. Off he went naked as the day he was born to get the soap. He quickly found some soap but on the way back he heard some nuns coming back so he decided to act as a new statue and stood frozen The nuns came round the corner and instantly noticed the figure stood on the hallway they giggled to each other and approached it. One nun grabbed the monks penis and pulled and the monk droped 2 of his bars of soap the nun exclaimed "Oh, look its a soap dispenser" Another nun approached the monk and the same happened The third nun approached the monk and pulled she screamed "It dispenses hand cream aswell" | |
Joke by Tomo123, in Religion and racism > Nuns - Tagged nuns , monks , soap - Current Score: 27 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| The Commandant of a concentration camp assembles all of his prisoners in the yard to give a brief address. He said to them, "I have good news and bad news. The good news is we are all going to Paris!" This was greeted with wary looks from the emaciated inmates. "The bad news is you are going as soap." | |
Joke by SirRofalot, in Religion and racism > Holocaust - Tagged jew , holocaust , concentration camp , soap - Current Score: 17 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| If a mute person swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap and water. | |
Joke by troyboy, in Illness and mortality > Deafness - Tagged deaf , soap , water - Current Score: 4 - Added: 5 months, 17 days ago
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