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| What do you give the girl who's got everything? Antibiotics. |    |
Joke by onecrazylemming, in Sex and shit > Sexual Diseases - Tagged std , women - Current Score: 142 - Added: 1 year ago
| A man goes to see the doctor complaining he has an orange cock. The doctor asks him to flop it out so he can have a look to see what the trouble is. The man duly gets his cock out for the doctor and, sure enough, it's bright orange. The doctor is amazed by this and tells the man he has never seen anything like it before and asks him when he last had had sex? "Never," says the man, "I'm a virgin and live on my own". "Does anyone else in your family have this affliction?" asks the doc. "Not that I'm aware of" replies the man. "Do you work with any strong chemicals?" queries the doctor. "No, I'm unemployed" states the man. "Really," says the doctor, "what do you do all day, then?" The man replies, "I sit at home watching porn films eating Wotsits." | |
Joke by Katherine Boyle, in Illness and mortality > Doctor - Tagged man , cock , wotsits , doctor , virgin , illness , std , sexual disease - Current Score: 83 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| A man calls his doctor and says: "Doctor, I think I may have caught an STD off my son's girlfriend." Doctor says: "Not to worry, these things happen. Come in and we'll sort it out." Man: "But that means my son has it, as well." Doctor: "Don't panic, bring him in, too" Man: "But I think I gave it to my wife." Doctor: "Fuck, that means we all have it!!!" | |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Sexual Diseases - Tagged std , doctor , sex , man , unlucky - Current Score: 50 - Added: 10 months, 4 days ago
| A guy meets a girl in a club, and at the end of the night they go back to hers for 'a few drinks'. The guy's getting down to business when he finds that his lady is very dry and rough down below. He tries to ignore it, but it's really starting to hurt him, so he asks her if she can do anything about it. "Sure," she smiles and disappears into the bathroom. A few minutes later she reappears, and he gets back to work, finding the environment much better. 'Wow!' he thinks, 'this is great!' He asks her, "what did you do to get so wet?" She looks at him, smiles, and says, "I just picked off my scabs and let the pus run out." | |
Joke by caliban, in Sex and shit > General - Tagged sex , std - Current Score: 25 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| I shagged a girl a couple of weeks ago who described herself as a "serial romancer". She was right - two weeks later my dick looks like it's covered in cornflakes and it's making its own milk! | |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Sexual Diseases - Tagged std , sex , sexual disease - Current Score: 20 - Added: 7 months, 24 days ago
| A lad & his girlfriend are having sex every night & the same old routine is starting to get boring. So, as she's a big girl, she suggests he sticks his foot inside her to see if that spices things up. The lad takes off his shoe & sock & rams his foot up her clopper. She squeals with delight & so he continues on a nightly basis giving her a good "footing". After a couple of weeks the lad notices a rash on his foot & hobbles off to see the doctor. The doc takes a look & says "It looks like you've got VD of the foot!". The lad asks if this is common, and the doctor scratches his head & says "I've never seen anything like it in my life! It's strange though, I've just had a girl in here with ATHLETE'S FANNY" | |
Joke by chelsea_steve, in Sex and shit > Sexual diseases - Tagged std , sex , fanny , fuck , disease , doctor - Current Score: 18 - Added: 1 year, 4 months ago
| How ironically gutting would you be if you caught an STI after having sex with a girl in a nurses outfit. | |
Joke by Bean, in Sex and shit > Kinky - Tagged sex , nurse , std , sti - Current Score: 15 - Added: 1 month, 10 days ago
| My new girlfriend is quite a catch. So far she's given me Clamydia, thrush and athlete's foot. | |
Joke by bawbag, in Sex and shit > Sexual Diseases - Tagged girlfiend , std - Current Score: 14 - Added: 3 months, 11 days ago
| What's the difference between marrying a woman with a kid and marrying a woman with an STD? You can't drown herpes in the bath. | |
Joke by newzero, in Sex and shit > Sexual Diseases - Tagged marry , kid , woman , std - Current Score: 14 - Added: 3 weeks ago
| I used to think syphillis tasted like peppermint... ...turns out it was just the ointment. | |
Joke by Cleveland, in Sex and shit > Sexual Diseases - Tagged std , sex , disease , gross - Current Score: 3 - Added: 3 months, 26 days ago
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