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| I bought a teddy bear for ten quid, just sold it on ebay for twenty. Now I've got the fucking Sudanese Muslims after me for making a prophet out of a teddy. |    |
Joke by bnmatt, in Celebrity and news events > Teddy Bear Mohammed - Tagged muslim , mohammed , sudan , teddy - Current Score: 745 - Added: 1 year ago
| Following the controversy over Mohammed the bear, Sooty has decided to cancel his tour of Africa | |
Joke by Monkeyman, in Celebrity and news events > Teddy Bear Mohammed - Tagged teddy , mohammed , sooty , africa , sudan , lenny henry - Current Score: 190 - Added: 1 year ago
| What does Hiroshima in Japan and Khartoum in the Sudan have in common? Nothing...yet | |
Joke by Holmesie, in Celebrity and news events > Teddy Bear Mohammed - Tagged teddy , bear , mohammed , hiroshima , khartoum , sudan - Current Score: 125 - Added: 1 year ago
| What have a teddy bear and the prophet Mohammed both got in common?.....They both sleep with kids. | |
Joke by fannybuster, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged teddy , bear , toy , mohamed , kids - Current Score: 114 - Added: 1 year ago
| A woman meets a guy in a bar. They talk; they connect; they end up leaving together. They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment, she noticed that one wall of his bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet, cuddly teddy bears. There are three shelves in the bedroom, with hundreds of cute, cuddly teddy bears, carefully placed in rows covering the entire wall. It was obvious that he had taken quite some time to lovingly arrange them and she was immediately touched by the amount of thought he had put in to organizing the display. There were small bears all along the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears covering the length of the middle shelf, and huge enormous bears running all the way along the top shelf. She found it strange for an obviously masculine guy to have such a large collection of Teddy bears, but doesn't mention this to him, and actually is quite impressed by his sensitive side. They share a bottle of wine and continue talking and, after a while, she finds herself thinking, 'Oh my God! Maybe this guy could be the one! Could he be the future father of my children?' She turns to him and kisses him lightly on the lips. He responds warmly. They continue to kiss; the passion builds; and he romantically lifts her in his arms and carries her into his bedroom where they rip off each other's clothes and make hot, steamy love. She is so overwhelmed that she responds with more passion, more creativity, more heat than she has ever known. After an intense, explosive night of raw passion with this sensitive guy,they lie there together in the afterglow. The woman rolls over, gently strokes his chest and asks coyly, "Well, how was it?" The guy gently smiles at her, strokes her cheek, looks deeply into her eyes, and says: "Help yourself to any prize from the middle shelf." | |
Joke by D dude, in Sex and shit > Sex - Tagged teddy , bear , shag , fuck - Current Score: 114 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| Gillian Gibbons has said that her original 15 day prison sentence seemed harsh at the time, but to be released and deported to Liverpool was "Totally fucking undeserved!". | |
Joke by chelsea_steve, in Celebrity and news events > Gillian Gibbons - Tagged gillian gibbons , teddy , bear , scousers , scouse , liverpool , sudan , muslim , mohammed - Current Score: 107 - Added: 1 year ago
| It is lucky that the Islamic teddy bear wasn't called Max Factor as that guarantees longer lashes. | |
Joke by fox in the box, in Celebrity and news events > Teddy Bear Mohammed - Tagged teddy , bear , max , factor , lashes - Current Score: 66 - Added: 1 year ago
| I went into a chemist yesterday and said to the bloke behind the counter, "excuse me, do you have cotton wool balls?" He said, "what do you think I am, a fuckin' teddy bear?" | |
Joke by pornstar, in Jokes with no home > Chemist - Tagged chemist , teddy , bear , cotton , wool , balls - Current Score: 53 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| I hear if you go to the Sudan and insult Islam you get free drinks. Apparently an English teacher out there did it and is about to get well lashed. | |
Joke by devondan, in Celebrity and news events > Gillian Gibbons - Tagged gillian gibbons , islam , liverpool , teddy , teacher - Current Score: 47 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| I took a leaf out of my wife's book and slipped on a sexy teddy when I wanted sex. Kids flock to anyone in one of those big bear costumes. | |
Joke by albinobob123, in Sex and shit > Paedophile - Tagged bear , teddy , sex , paedophile , kids - Current Score: 21 - Added: 2 months, 8 days ago
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