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| Three women were in the waiting room of a gynecologist, and each of them was knitting a sweater for their baby-to-be. The first one stopped and took a pill. "What was that?" The others asked her. "Oh, it was Vitamin C - I want my baby to be healthy." A few minutes later, another woman took a pill. "What was that?" the others asked. "Oh, it was iron - I want my baby to be big and strong." They continued knitting. Finally the third woman took a pill. "What was that?" the others asked her. "It was thalidomide," she said, "I just can't get the arms right on this fucking sweater!" |    |
Joke by caliban, in Illness and mortality > Pregnancy and Abortion - Tagged thalidomide , arms , sweater , baby , babies , three , gynecologist , gynecologists , pill , pills , arm , jumper , knitting , knit , sleeve - Current Score: 405 - Added: 1 year, 6 months ago
| Those bastards in the pub, they told me it would be okay to keep a turkey in the freezer for up to three months. I put one in last night, and when I checked this morning, it was fucking dead. | |
Joke by staffer, in Jokes with no home > Pub - Tagged dead , night , three , freezer , turkey - Current Score: 159 - Added: 5 months, 7 days ago
| They say good things come in threes. But I hardly think you can describe Gary Glitter as a 'good thing'. | |
Joke by giobob, in Celebrity and news events > Gary Glitter - Tagged gary glitter , cum , three , paedophilia - Current Score: 44 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| An English cat called "One two three" and a French cat called "Un deux trois" are arguing over which cat is the best swimmer, so they decide to have a race over the English channel and, of course, the English cat won, because the Un deux trois cat sank! | |
Joke by pornstar, in Religion and racism > French - Tagged french , cat , english , channel , sank , one , two , three , swim - Current Score: 41 - Added: 4 months ago
| I'm just two people away from a 'Menage a Trois'. | |
Joke by Darklord, in Sex and shit > Threesomes - Tagged two , people , menage a trois , three - Current Score: 28 - Added: 5 months, 19 days ago
| A man is casually strolling through an Asian desert when he discovers a black lamp. For the hell of it, he rubs the lamp, and to his surprise an evil-looking genie pops out. "Hello master," says the genie. "I can now grant you three evil wishes." "Wow," the man says. "What's the catch?" "Your first wish must be for revenge," says the evil genie. "OK, Jade Goody has annoyed me countless times on the TV," says the man. "I wish she gets cancer. That'll teach her." "It is done," the genie obeys. "Your second wish must give comeuppance in an evil manner." "Fine. Kerry Katona has far too much money, and she's a fucking awful mother. I wish she becomes bankrupt." "It is done," grants the genie. "Your third and final wish must frustrate millions." "I wish to get a plane back to the UK." "It is done, Mr. Glitter." | |
Joke by Roll Fizzlebeef, in Celebrity and news events > Gary Glitter - Tagged jade goody , kerry katona , bankrupt , cancer , genie , wishes , three , evil , gary , glitter , paedo , paedophille - Current Score: 25 - Added: 3 months, 12 days ago
| What do you call a man with three balls? ...a juggler. | |
Joke by littledave, in Jokes with no home > Stupid - Tagged three , stupidness , balls - Current Score: 18 - Added: 2 months, 5 days ago
| A man walks into a lawyer's office and asks, "How much would it be to ask you three questions?" The attorney answered, "$500." "Holy cow!" the man replied, "That's a bit steep, isn't it?" "No." said the attorney. "What's your third question?" | |
Joke by yank, in Jokes with no home > Advice - Tagged attorney , three , questions - Current Score: 1 - Added: 1 year ago
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