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| One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds. One of the boys said, "What is that?" "They're smart pills," said the other boy. "Eat them and they'll make you smarter." So he ate them and said, "these taste like shit." "See," said the other boy, "you're getting smarter already." |    |
Joke by Guest, in Jokes with no home > Boys - Tagged turds , shit , woods , pills , eat - Current Score: 72 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| Two rats in a sewer. The first one says, " I'm sick of this, turds for breakfast, turds for dinner, yet more turds for tea and - Fuck Me! - guess what? A turd for supper." And the other rat says, "don't worry, tonight we'll go on the piss." | |
Joke by pornstar, in Religion and racism > Africans - Tagged rats , turds , piss , breakfast , dinner , tea , supper , sewer - Current Score: 38 - Added: 1 year, 2 months ago
| A resolution was recently proposed in the UN to form a new union between the Turks and Kurds. This would create a new nation along the Iraqi border to be called the ''Turds''. There was a serious disturbance and complaints by France who vetoed the resolution citing historical rights to the name. | |
Joke by welsh twat, in Religion and racism > French - Tagged france , turds , kurds , veto , iraq - Current Score: 14 - Added: 3 months, 4 days ago
| Devout Muslims. If The Prophet Mohamed has not yet made himself visible to you, perhaps you are looking in the wrong place. Try looking at the flaky paint on your walls, your rusty frying pan, in the centre of a rotten potato, in the centre of a stale loaf, or in a pile of turds at the bottom of your lavatory, as these are the sort of places he usually turns up. | |
Joke by northerngeorge, in Religion and racism > Muslims - Tagged muslim , mohamed , lavatory , turds , viz - Current Score: 12 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| Steve, a kid fresh out of school, gets a job inspecting the London sewer network. It's his first day so they send him down with Martin, an old hand with 20 years experience in the job. As they walk around Martin tells Steve that its a really interesting job. "You learn lots about people down here," he says. Steve asks, "how do you mean?" With that, Martin grabs a turd that's floating by and says, "look, I can tell that this shit came from a poor man. See how it snaps when you try to bend it? That's because the he eats lots of rubbish pre-packaged food - it makes his shit hard and brittle." Steve's a little unnerved by the way Martin handles a turd but, as its his first day, he decides not to question it. "See this one?" Martin continues. "This is the shit of a rich man: soft and pliable. That's because he eats lots of rich, fatty foods." By this time Steve's thinking he should at least pretend to be interested in what this disgusting old fart's saying, so he points at a turd and says, "what about this one?" Martin scoops it up, looks at it for a moment and says, "that's a turd from one of them homosexuals." Steve asks, "how the hell do you know that?" To which Martin replied, "here, look at the end..... it's concave." | |
Joke by Dayop, in Sex and shit > Shit - Tagged turds , homosexual , shit - Current Score: 1 - Added: 1 month, 16 days ago
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