Sorted by: Highest Scoring | Lowest Scoring | Newest | Oldest
Showing all jokes.
| Hearty congratulations to Venus Williams on beating Elena Dementieva to get to the final of Wimbledon. I mean have you looked at Dementieva? She's gorgeous. How Venus managed to concentrate on her tennis with an erection is beyond me. |    |
Joke by oxbridge, in Celebrity and news events > Wimbledon - Tagged venus , williams , dementieva , tennis , wimbledon - Current Score: 471 - Added: 4 months ago
| It has been announced in Zimbabwe that Robert Mugabe won Wimbledon | |
Joke by nevergreen, in Celebrity and news events > Zimbabwe - Tagged zimbabwe , wimbledon , mugabe - Current Score: 250 - Added: 4 months ago
| I saw two black dogs chasing a ball across some grass today as they barked as loudly as they could at each other. Apparently, that's tennis these days. | |
Joke by Stig, in Celebrity and news events > Wimbledon - Tagged black , wimbledon , tennis , serena , venus , williams - Current Score: 241 - Added: 4 months ago
| According to a TV commentator today, there is "Nothing more painful than going out of Wimbledon live on TV." That's an absurd exaggeration- what about a paper cut on the bell end? | |
Joke by antibagdave, in Celebrity and news events > Wimbledon - Tagged bell end , cock , paper cut , penis , wimbledon , nob , winky , tennis , pain , painful - Current Score: 148 - Added: 4 months, 23 days ago
| Tim Henman's career move to the BBC has been a really good one, as this way he's guaranteed a place at the Wimbledon final. | |
Joke by The Wolf, in Celebrity and news events > Wimbledon - Tagged wimbledon , tim henman , bbc , final - Current Score: 60 - Added: 4 months, 23 days ago
| Wimbledon 2009, Day 3 Report: History has been made here today at the All England Lawn Tennis Club. For the first time ever, all the Brits participating in Wimbledon are still in the competition after three days. We are all hoping that the rain will have stopped by Day 4... | |
Joke by DDJ, in Jokes with no home > Accident - Tagged wimbledon , brits , shit - Current Score: 55 - Added: 4 months, 27 days ago
| Apparently, the inability of Tim Henman to get past a semi has always left his wife very sexually frustrated. | |
Joke by nevergreen, in Celebrity and news events > Wimbledon - Tagged wimbledon , tim henman - Current Score: 37 - Added: 4 months, 22 days ago
| So its Wimbledon week again. The British nation expects success....... ....and three days later we remember that we are shit at tennis. | |
Joke by RevvyB, in Celebrity and news events > Wimbledon - Tagged wimbledon , shit - Current Score: 19 - Added: 4 months, 27 days ago
| A woman wakes in a hospital to find a doctor stood over her. She asks him what happened, to which he replies, "Madam, you were in a horrific car crash with your son and daughter and have just woken up from a coma." She says, "my son was an amazing footballer and could have been the next Pele. Where is he?" The Doctor replies, "he had his legs crushed and they had to be amputated." "And my daughter...she was a fantastic tennis player and could have won at Wimbledon. What about her"? He says "I'm afraid there was too much damage as she went through the window - we had to remove her arms." Emotionally crushed, the woman asks the doctor how long she had been in a coma and what date it was, to which he replied, "you were in a coma for six months, and today is April the first." She says, "April Fool's day - so were you joking?" "Ha ha, yeah... they both died on impact." | |
Joke by robydoby, in Illness and mortality > Car Crash - Tagged woman , doctor , crash , coma , footballer , pele , son , tennis , wimbledon , daughter , arms , legs , april fools , death - Current Score: 18 - Added: 3 months ago
| A resident of Dunblane was asked if he could remember that tragic day. "It was terrible. Shots firing everywhere and nowhere to hide. Afterwards it was just total shock. No-one could understand how this could happen," he said, voice trembling, "but, hopefully, Andy will pull it together for Wimbledon next year!" | |
Joke by bawbag, in Celebrity and news events > Andy Murray - Tagged andy murray , dunblane , tennis , shooting , wimbledon - Current Score: 13 - Added: 2 months ago
Showing all jokes.
Custurd spent 0.12ms doing 12 queries and 0.09s processing. She's 1.99% angry.
Sickipedia v2.7 - a cr3ative media® project. © '05-09 Rob Manuel