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| Microsoft's new Windows advert talks about life without walls... Surely life without walls is a Window's worst nightmare??? |    |
Joke by Jamieee, in Celebrity and news events > Microsoft - Tagged windows , microsoft , bill gates , muppets - Current Score: 200 - Added: 1 week ago
| A man goes to the World Trade Center. He says "I want to buy a jumbo jet" "We don't sell jumbo jets here sir", was the reply. "Well you've got one in the window!" | |
Joke by caliban, in Celebrity and news events > 9/11 - Tagged world , wtc , 911 , trade , centre , world trade centre , america , usa , jumbo , jet , jumbo jet , jets , plane , planes , crash , window , windows - Current Score: 165 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| Computers are like air conditioners. They work fine until you start opening windows. | |
Joke by AS, in Jokes with no home > Computers - Tagged computer , windows - Current Score: 164 - Added: 4 months ago
| How do you kill a bunch of retards on a bus? Put poison on the windows. | |
Joke by caliban, in Illness and mortality > Disability - Tagged retard , disabled , disability , retards , retarded , bus , poison , window , windows , kill , killed , murder , spastic , spaz - Current Score: 119 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| Bill Gates dies, and appears before God on Judgment Day. "Well, Bill," said God, "I'm really confused on this one. I'm not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world, and yet you created that ghastly Windows. "I'm going to do something I've never done before. I'm going to let you decide where you want to go." Bill replied, "Well thanks, God. What's the difference between the two?" God said, "You take a peek at both places briefly if it will help you decide. Shall we look at Hell first?" "Sure" said Bill, "Let's go!" Bill was amazed! He saw a clean, white sandy beach with clear waters. There were thousands of beautiful men and women running around, playing in the water, laughing and frolicking about. The sun was shining and the temperature was perfect. "This is great!" said Bill. "If this is Hell, I can't wait to see Heaven." God replied, "Let's go!" and so off they went to Heaven. Bill saw puffy white clouds in a beautiful blue sky with angels drifting about playing harps and singing. It was nice, but surely not as enticing as Hell. Bill Gates thought for only a brief moment and rendered his decision. "God, I do believe I would like to go to Hell." "As you desire." said God. Two weeks later, God decided to check up on the late billionaire to see how things were going. He found Bill Gates shackled to a wall, screaming amongst the hot flames in a dark cave. He was being burned and tortured by demons. "How ya doin', Bill?" asked God. Bill responded with anguish and despair, "This is awful! This is not what I expected at all! What happened to the beach and the beautiful women playing in the water?" "Oh THAT!" said God. "That was the Screen saver!!!" | |
Joke by niggers out, in Illness and mortality > A Man Was...... - Tagged windows , heaven , god , bill , gates - Current Score: 48 - Added: 9 months ago
| They say if you play a Microsoft CD backwards, you hear satanic messages. That's nothing, because if you play it forwards, it installs Windows. | |
Joke by joetalin, in Jokes with no home > Microsoft - Tagged microsoft , windows , satan , cd , urban dictionary - Current Score: 32 - Added: 3 months ago
| Windows. Such a pane. | |
Joke by cb, in Jokes with no home > Wordplay - Tagged computers , windows , pane , pain - Current Score: 13 - Added: 2 weeks ago
| What do you call a Hotel without windows? A fucking DOS house. | |
Joke by blakes, in Jokes with no home > Computers - Tagged windows , hotel , doss , dos , vista , computers , shithole , xp - Current Score: 8 - Added: 1 month, 25 days ago
| The new Microsoft Windows adverts talk about "life without walls". Frankly I'm not surprised - walls provide the most basic form of security. | |
Joke by storyteller, in Jokes with no home > Computers - Tagged windows , linux , house , firewall , larry wall , virus - Current Score: 6 - Added: 1 week ago
| A blonde enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains." The salesman assures her that they have a large selection of pink curtains. He shows her several patterns, but the blond seems to be having a hard time choosing. Finally she selects a lovely pink floral print. The salesman then asks what size curtains she needs. The blonde promptly replies, "fifteen inches." "Fifteen inches???" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?" The blonde tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for her computer monitor The surprised salesman replies, "but Miss, computers do not need curtains!" The blond says, "Hellllooooooooo .... I've got Windoooooows!" | |
Joke by ht, in Celebrity and news events > viagra - Tagged blondes , windows - Current Score: 2 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
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