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| Women are like parking spaces, normally all the good ones are taken. So, occasionally, when no one's looking, you have to stick it in a disabled one. |    |
Joke by eatmeat, in Sex and shit > Adultery - Tagged women , disabled , parking - Current Score: 1035 - Added: 1 year, 3 months ago
| What's long and hard and makes women groan? An Ironing Board. | |
Joke by DDJ, in Jokes with no home > random - Tagged women , ironing , hard , iron - Current Score: 578 - Added: 9 months ago
| Women eh! Boob jobs, nose jobs, teeth bleaching, tummy tucks, liposuction, colonic irrigation, botox, pierced ears, nipples, bellys and clits, eyebrows plucked, bikini wax, armpits shaved, lips tattooed, legs waxed, diets, exercise but they won't take it up the arse cause it 'hurts'. | |
Joke by dualta13, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged anal sex , women - Current Score: 433 - Added: 1 year, 1 month ago
| Things You Learn From Watching Porn Women wear high heels to bed. Men are never impotent. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he fucks her. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with spunk. Women enjoy having sex with ugly middle-aged men. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blow job. Women always orgasm when men do. A blow job will always get a woman off a speeding ticket. All women are noisy fucks. People in the 70's couldn't fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background. Those tits are real. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt. Men always groan 'OH YEAH' when they cum. If there is two of them they 'high five' each other. (and the girl isn't disgusted!) Double penetration makes women smile. Asian men don't exist. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes the boyfriend won't bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend's mouth. There's a plot. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the ass. Nurses suck patients cocks. Men always pull out. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she'll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking both of you. Women never have headaches. When a woman is sucking a man's cock, it's important for him to remind her to 'suck it' Assholes are clean. A man ejaculating on a woman's butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's pants and find a cock there. Men don't have to beg. When standing during a blow job, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman's head and the other proudly on his hip. Pigtails = handlebars. | |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Pornography - Tagged pornos , men , women , blowjobs , sex , woman - Current Score: 412 - Added: 8 months, 22 days ago
| Why do only 15 % of women go to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be hell. | |
Joke by mamma mia, in Sex and shit > Women - Tagged women , hell , heaven - Current Score: 381 - Added: 4 months ago
| Why do women keep telling me to 'go fuck myself'? Surely they've realised that if I could fuck myself, I wouldn't be putting my hands up their skirts in the first place. | |
Joke by munkybars, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged go , fuck , myself , women , skirts , hands - Current Score: 376 - Added: 3 months ago
| What's black, has eight legs and makes women scream? Gang rape. | |
Joke by caliban, in Sex and shit > Rape - Tagged rape , sex , gang , gang rape , eight , leg , legs , black , racist , racism , scream , women , screams , raped - Current Score: 359 - Added: 1 year, 5 months ago
| Why are women like clouds? Because when they fuck off it's usually a nice day. | |
Joke by Guest, in Sex and shit > Young girls - Tagged women , clouds , nice , day - Current Score: 318 - Added: 8 months ago
| How come, when a couple get divorced, the bloke has to pay his ex-wife a share of his future earnings but the woman doesn't have to do the bloke's future housework? | |
Joke by got spunk, in Jokes with no home > Divorce - Tagged divorce , women , greedy sluts - Current Score: 303 - Added: 2 months, 27 days ago
| Got home from the pub at three o'clock this morning and the missus was waiting at the door with a rolling pin. I said, "What the fuck are you doing baking at this hour?" | |
Joke by Nimrod, in Sex and shit > Wife - Tagged women , baking - Current Score: 293 - Added: 6 months, 28 days ago
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