• Dog Botherer's Statistics

  • My old, largely unused account is DogBot.

    I mostly use Sickipedia as a means to boost my fragile self esteem by seeking the approval of anonymous strangers on the internet.

    • User Level:
    • User
    • This Month's Leaderboard Points:
    • 100
    • Total Contribution Points:
    • 2127
    • Total Joke Score:
    • 21,641
    • Total Time Active:
    • 582 hours, 19 minutes
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  • Message

Note: once generated statistics are saved and may not be re-calculated for up to 48 hours. These statistics have just been generated for you. Aren't we nice?

  • Joke Statistics

    • Total Jokes Submitted:
    • 807
    • Live Jokes:
    • 493
    • Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates):
    • 314
    • Average Joke Score (All Jokes):
    • 26.82
    • Average Time Before Deletion:
    • 30,391m
    • Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted):
    • 43.90
    • Duplicate Jokes:
    • 38

Dog Botherer's Jokes

As a struggling actor I was thrilled when my agent phoned with an audition.

"The part's made for you," he said. "They want someone your age, height and build with an accent like yours, and it's being filmed about 5 minutes from your house."

"It sounds perfect!" I replied excitedly. "What is it?"

"It's a Crimewatch rape reconstruction."

"Erm... No... I'm busy that day..."
Every Christmas I'd come running downstairs to the big pile of presents and start unwrapping them as fast as I could. Sometimes there would be fights over who had the best toys but we would all make up later and sit down to have a three hour lunch before watching TV for the rest of the day.

I really miss working at the Royal Mail sorting office.