Dogbite66's Statistics
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User Statistics
| User Level: | User | ||
| Contribution Points: | 219 | ||
| Total Joke Score: | 5,199 | ||
| Total Time Active: | 133 hours, 31 minutes | ||
Joke Statistics
| Total Jokes Submitted: | 347 | Live Jokes: | 134 | |
| Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): | 213 | Duplicate Jokes: | 88 | |
| Average Joke Score (All Jokes): | 14.98 | Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted): | 38.80 | |
| Average Time Before Deletion: | 2,948m | |||
| Favourite Subcategory | Other > ??? Random (18) | |||
The best of Dogbite66's 134 jokes (View All).
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I left a trail of rose petals from the front door, up the stairs, and to the bedroom. I sprinkled some more over the bed. I sat in the corner wearing nothing but her beautiful silk robe with a bottle of vintage wine on ice on the end table. I heard the door open and her walking up the stairs, I wanted this to be the most romantic evening ever. I was quite nervous... Now all I needed was the perfect way to introduce myself. |
 
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I just got robbed at the petrol station. It's getting real bad over here. I called the cops and they asked if I knew who did it. "It was pump #5," I replied. |
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| I'll act my age when I'm 69. |
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| Women love a man brimming with confidence. Because, without that, what's to destroy? |
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How do you stop a man breaking into your house? Replace the locks with bra fasteners. |
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| I'm pretty damn sure after lesbians have sex, there's an insane amount of not shutting the fuck up. |
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There have been about 514 leap years since Caesar created it in 45BC. Without the extra day every 4 years today would be 28th July, 2013. Also, the Mayan calendar did not account for leap year... so technically the world should have ended 7 months ago. Which it did... It was my wedding day. |
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Joke
by Dogbite66 in Sex and shit - Marriage (+ 1 more) - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 258.4
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Alcohol: Giving you the ambition to do anything... ...while simultaneously taking away your ability to do so. |
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Joke
submitted by Dogbite66, originally by Scumbag Alcohol (Anonymous) in Illness and mortality - Alcohol And Drugs - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 257.2
| I'd like to thank my skeletal system for all the support it's given me over the years. |
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| I am a huge fan of underground music. Amy Winehouse, Whitney Houston, Michael Jackson...... |
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Joke
by Dogbite66 in Celebrities - Amy Winehouse (+ 2 more) - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 174.6
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