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alexxxx's Statistics

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User Statistics
User Level: User
Contribution Points: 109
Total Joke Score: 2,596
Total Time Active: 62 hours, 4 minutes
Joke Statistics
Total Jokes Submitted: 272 Live Jokes: 108
Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): 164 Duplicate Jokes: 13
Average Joke Score (All Jokes): 9.54 Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted): 24.04
Average Time Before Deletion: 1,980m
Favourite Subcategory Other > Wordplay (45)

The best of alexxxx's 108 jokes (View All).
1250090
I suggested to my wife that she'd look sexier with her hair back.

Which is apparently an insensitive thing to say to a cancer patient. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Other - Wordplay - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 920.4

1187350
I'd had a few drinks the other night and mistook a dwarf for a small child. I've never been so embarrassed, now I have to live with the sickening knowledge that I fucked a dwarf. I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Sex and shit - Paedophile (+ 1 more) - Added: 4 months ago - Current Score: 252

1240857
My mother smoked constantly when she was pregnant with me, but in her defence, we all make bad decisions when we're drunk. I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Illness and mortality - Smoking - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 251.8

1240806
A workmate of mine recently got divorced and I've noticed he gets upset every time he sees the family picture I've got on my desk.

I think he misses them. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Other - Misunderstanding - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 227.8

1257251
Just received a text from my wife saying, "You're a childish cunt sometimes."

I was so annoyed. I thought I'd hidden her phone really well this time. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Other - Joke - Added: 1 month, 21 days ago - Current Score: 113.8

1244249
According to my Spanish doctor, I have 'Hepatitis Yes'. I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Other - Wordplay - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 72

1236742
"So how's Sarah?" My mate asked, "Bet she's more excited than you for the wedding!"

"She's like a headless chicken." I replied.

"Oh I bet, running round trying to get everything sorted for the big day, is she?"

"No, she's dead." 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Illness and mortality - Death - Added: 2 months, 18 days ago - Current Score: 64.4

1205964
Yesterday, my wife told me that my schoolgirl fetish was 'fucking disgusting'.

So I put her in detention for swearing. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Sex and shit - Fetish - Added: 3 months, 24 days ago - Current Score: 45.4

1251821
My disabled friend just told me that some of the things I've been saying about his condition are 'insensitive'.

"Like your legs?" I replied. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Other - Wordplay - Added: 1 month, 29 days ago - Current Score: 44.4

342244
What do the Heads of Government in both Britain and America have in common?

They're both brown. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by alexxxx in Politics - Elections (+ 2 more) - Added: 2 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 30.8


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