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donni's Profile Information:

This is my Sickipedia account. There are many like it, but this one is mine.

donni's Statistics

Note: once generated statistics are saved and may not be re-calculated for up to 48 hours. These statistics were generated 36 minutes ago.

User Statistics
User Level: User
Contribution Points: 666
Total Joke Score: 7,503
Total Time Active: 464 hours, 35 minutes
Joke Statistics
Total Jokes Submitted: 713 Live Jokes: 270
Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): 443 Duplicate Jokes: 57
Average Joke Score (All Jokes): 10.52 Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted): 27.79
Average Time Before Deletion: 5,172m
Favourite Subcategory Other > ??? Random (33)

The best of donni's 270 jokes (View All).
1266454
I tried to share a kebab with a homeless guy I saw sitting on a bench last night.

He told me to fuck off and buy my own. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Other - Stupid - Added: 1 month ago - Current Score: 906.2

1204190
I was so pissed off after arguing with my wife last night.

When she went to bed, I sneaked into the kitchen and tightened every jar and bottle in the cupboard. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Sex and shit - Wife - Added: 3 months, 26 days ago - Current Score: 588.4

1271832
I don't know why I even bother having a smartphone anymore.

It spends so much time on charge, you might as well call it a landline. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Other - ??? Random - Added: 4 weeks ago - Current Score: 573

1253405
I took my son's goldfish to the vet today but it died just before we got there.

I knew I should have put some air holes in the cardboard box. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Other - Animals/Insects - Added: 1 month, 27 days ago - Current Score: 315.2

1213400
I left a note on my neighbour's car asking him to stop parking in front of my house.

I couldn't find any paper, so I used my car key instead. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Crime - Vandalism - Added: 3 months ago - Current Score: 288

1286741
I just don't understand my wife sometimes.

Last night she let me stick my tongue in her arsehole.

This morning, I took a swig of milk from the bottle and she said I'm disgusting. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Sex and shit - Wife - Added: 1 week ago - Current Score: 266.4

1241648
I have been giving my wife the silent treatment for the past couple of days.

Unfortunately, she is not returning the favour. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Sex and shit - Wife - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 256.8

1202671
A man who saved a 10 year old girl from being abducted claims to be an illegal immigrant.

Great, now they're stealing Batman's job too. 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Crime - Abduction - Added: 3 months, 28 days ago - Current Score: 245.6

1240720
Asda calls them self-checkouts.

I call them "I'm not paying for some of this." 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Crime - Shoplifting - Added: 2 months ago - Current Score: 227.2

1276075
I held the door for a little old lady in the shop today.

We all laughed as she banged on the window shouting, "Let me in." 		I like this! This is poor.  Edit this
Joke by donni in Other - Stupid - Added: 3 weeks ago - Current Score: 226.4


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