drof's Profile Information:
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Have a lie down and a pot of Darjeeling. Maybe a Breakaway too, if you're feeling crazy.
Oops! We could not find anything funny here.
Have a lie down and a pot of Darjeeling. Maybe a Breakaway too, if you're feeling crazy.
drof's Statistics
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User Statistics
| User Level: | Admin | ||
| Total Joke Score: | 67,761 | ||
| Total Time Active: | 1,067 hours, 11 minutes | ||
The best of drof's 1,155 jokes (View All).
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Rick Astley asked me if he could borrow my collection of Pixar films. "Okay," I said. "You can have Toy Story, Cars and Finding Nemo but I'm never gonna give you Up." |
 
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Joke
by drof in Celebrities - Musician/Singer - Added: 1 year, 10 months ago - Current Score: 1,852.8
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I can't see an end. I have no control and I don't think there's any escape - I don't even have a home anymore. Definitely time for a new keyboard. |
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Opinions are like orgasms. Mine's more important and I don't give a fuck if she has one. |
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A girl came up to me in a bar - short skirt, tits like ripe fruit, hair in a pony tail. "What would you say if I told you I was wearing no underwear?" she breathed. "I'd say 'neither am I'." She raised her eyebrows. "Really? I'm wearing none because it gives men like you..." she licked her lips, "easy access..." "Oh?" I replied. "I've got none on because I shit myself in the gents." |
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Roses are red, but there are also pink, white and yellow varieties Violets aren't blue, they're violet, hence the name I've got OCD And my poetry skills are also lacking. |
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It's really difficult to find what you want on eBay. I was searching for cigarette lighters and found over 15,000 matches. |
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My New Year's resolutions are: 1. Stop making lists. B. Be more consistent. 7. Learn to count. |
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I was in McDonald's and this stunning young girl took my order. "I can make it large for you for an extra 30p," she said sweetly. "I'm afraid you already have," I replied, "but how about a wank for a pound?" |
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Joke
by drof in Other - Food and Drink (+ 2 more) - Added: 2 years, 6 months ago - Current Score: 1,080.4
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My wife has packed her bags and gone - just because of my fetish with touching pasta. I'm feeling cannelloni right now. |
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My wife asked me how I could love her and still enjoy watching porn. I told her, I love my car but I still watch Formula 1 too. She was happy with this analogy - I just never mentioned I also go to Hertz for the occasional rental. |
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