• exiledroyal's Statistics

    • User Level:
    • User
    • This Month's Leaderboard Points:
    • 0
    • Total Contribution Points:
    • 874
    • Total Joke Score:
    • 2,875
    • Total Time Active:
    • 312 hours, 33 minutes
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Note: once generated statistics are saved and may not be re-calculated for up to 48 hours. These statistics have just been generated for you. Aren't we nice?

  • Joke Statistics

    • Total Jokes Submitted:
    • 882
    • Live Jokes:
    • 278
    • Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates):
    • 604
    • Average Joke Score (All Jokes):
    • 3.26
    • Average Time Before Deletion:
    • 60,738m
    • Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted):
    • 10.34
    • Duplicate Jokes:
    • 132

exiledroyal's Jokes

"Don't give the baby a paper clip!" the wife shouted at me. "He'll swallow it!"

"It's OK, I've got hundreds," I retorted.
Scientology believes that illness doesn't really exist, that it's all in the mind.

I was talking to a bloke at work who believes that kind of thing, and was telling him that my dad was ill.

"No, he's not ill," he said. "He's only under the impression that he's ill. Just tell him that."

I bumped into him a week later. "How's your dad?"

"He's under the impression that he's dead," I replied.