• geebee's Statistics

  • The only thing wrong with this site is the bunch of clowns who copy jokes from other sites and paste them here, only to be pissed off when they find that it's been done before.

    The best way is to make your own jokes up - unless of course you are either from Germany or America, in which case you are on the wrong site!

    Q. Where would we be without humour?

    A. America or Germany!

    Finally; Never let the truth stand in the way of a good story!

    • User Level:
    • User
    • This Month's Leaderboard Points:
    • 0
    • Total Contribution Points:
    • 1709
    • Total Joke Score:
    • 33,880
    • Total Time Active:
    • 422 hours, 0 minutes
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Note: once generated statistics are saved and may not be re-calculated for up to 48 hours. These statistics have just been generated for you. Aren't we nice?

  • Joke Statistics

    • Total Jokes Submitted:
    • 2,601
    • Live Jokes:
    • 609
    • Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates):
    • 1,992
    • Average Joke Score (All Jokes):
    • 13.03
    • Average Time Before Deletion:
    • 42,807m
    • Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted):
    • 55.63
    • Duplicate Jokes:
    • 288

geebee's Jokes

I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor balcony shaking a carpet.

I shouted up to him, "What's up Abdul, won't it fucking start?"
A gourmet goes into a restaurant and asks for a menu.

The waiter tells him they don't have a menu, the customer expresses a desire and they fulfil it.

"Okay, smart arse, I'd like virgin lark's tongues braised in love juice on toast," says the man smugly.

Without batting an eyelid, the waiter heads for the kitchen to place the order.

Two minutes later he's back at the table.

"The chef's sorry to disappoint you, sir, but we're fresh out of toast!"
I once raped an Essex girl. It wasn't as exciting as I'd imagined it to be....

...She fucking enjoyed it more than I did and asked for a date afterwards!