glynathan's Statistics
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User Statistics
| User Level: | User | ||
| Contribution Points: | 10 | ||
| Total Joke Score: | 93 | ||
| Total Time Active: | 20 hours, 2 minutes | ||
Joke Statistics
| Total Jokes Submitted: | 84 | Live Jokes: | 20 | |
| Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): | 64 | Duplicate Jokes: | 3 | |
| Average Joke Score (All Jokes): | 1.11 | Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted): | 4.65 | |
| Average Time Before Deletion: | 33,834m | |||
| Favourite Subcategory | In The News > Natural Disasters (3) | |||
The best of glynathan's 20 jokes (View All).
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My girlfriend asked me if there was any special treat that I wanted for my birthday. So I asked for a creampie and to be able to finger it it out slowly. She's not speaking to me now and thinks I'm sick. She needs to get a fucking grip, it's my birthday and I will have a cream cake with no spoon if I want. |
 
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| We shouldn't discriminate against fat women, in fact I believe they are better for taking home after a night out for three reasons. First, they are far more grateful and will not complain about how shit you are performing. Secondly, they are not fat because they eat lettuce. For certain she is gonna eat hard in the morning so you can be sure of some hangover grub. Lastly, she's fat so there's no chance she walks anywhere. Thus confirming she has a car and will drop you home the next day. |
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Joke
by glynathan in Sex and shit - One Night Stand - Added: 2 years, 1 month ago - Current Score: 15.8
| Gary Coleman + Chernobyl = Harvey Price |
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Joke
by glynathan in Celebrities - Harvey Price - Added: 2 years, 3 months ago - Current Score: 10.4
| My wife text me and said that she had applied for us to go on the Jeremy Kyle show. I didn't want to be embarrassed live on tv so I asked her what the name of the show would be that day. She said "lying cheating perverts who touch kids". Confused me a little, I don't know why she would bring herself on tv to admit all that to the world. |
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BBC news: man floats out into sea on rooftop. I think Noah misunderstood Gods Instructions. |
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My wife wants to sign up to weight watchers. I've watched her get fat for 13 years and she didnt pay me for the privilege. |
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Joke
by glynathan in Illness and mortality - Obesity - Added: 2 years, 2 months ago - Current Score: 6.4
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BBC News: Tokyo plan bid for 2020 Olympics. The facilities for the water events have already been installed. |
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Joke
by glynathan in In The News - Natural Disasters - Added: 2 years, 1 month ago - Current Score: 5.6
| I don't like one night stands. I always end up in the same predicament. Do I come cum inside her, Do I pull out or do I wake her up? |
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Joke
by glynathan in Sex and shit - One Night Stand - Added: 2 years, 1 month ago - Current Score: 5.4
| It's ironic how the most popular Muslim name is Mohammed yet contains pork. |
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Jim and Gary were pissed up on a lads night out away from the wives. They managed to chat up two decent looking birds and agreed to have sex back at their place. Both women bent over naked on all fours ready for pleasure. Jim enters the first bird with a grin on his face an thrusts away. Gary is sobering up and starts to feel guilty about betraying his wife.
He says "jim, maybe this ain't such a great idea. Think about your wife." He replies" fuck sake Gary now I've [...] |
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