• opr's Statistics

    • User Level:
    • User
    • This Month's Leaderboard Points:
    • 0
    • Total Contribution Points:
    • 5
    • Total Joke Score:
    • 634
    • Total Time Active:
    • 1 hours, 43 minutes
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  • Joke Statistics

    • Total Jokes Submitted:
    • 24
    • Live Jokes:
    • 5
    • Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates):
    • 19
    • Average Joke Score (All Jokes):
    • 26.42
    • Average Time Before Deletion:
    • 189,351m
    • Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted):
    • 126.80
    • Duplicate Jokes:
    • 5

opr's Jokes

Today at the garage where I work, a woman came in with her disabled son and asked me if I could modify her car so it would be easier for him to get in and out etc.

"No problem at all," I said, "Oh and one more thing, what flavour windows would you like?"
When PC Gurmeal Singh refused to remove his turban in place for a helmet for riot training, why didn't the police chief send him out on riot duty the next weekend?
See how protective your fucking turban is now, cunt.
Ok so today i finally thought I'd caught out those racist blacks, I was going to join the "Black policeman's association".

My thinking was: if a white man had made this, it would be illegal, and stopped immediately.

Anyway, I applied to join, and they said no - of course not.

"Yes", I thought, "I have finally got these racists"

"Is it because I'm not black?" I asked trying to get some evidence against them

"No", they said, "It's because you're not a policeman"

On Big Brother last night, Vinnie Jones was telling the "housemates" that he had his own personal cook, personal cleaner, personal housekeeper and personal laundry woman.

Yeah, I've got a wife too, but I don't go bragging about it mate.
I was taking my Car Theory test today and the following question came up...

How can you avoid having your car radio stolen?

a) Park in a well lit area
b) Park in a garage
c) Cover it in a blanket
d) Get a security-coded radio

i was a little confused as i couldn't find the answer that read: "Don't park in Liverpool"