stuart3455's Statistics
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User Statistics
| User Level: | User | ||
| Contribution Points: | 225 | ||
| Total Joke Score: | 1,039 | ||
| Total Time Active: | 26 hours, 23 minutes | ||
Joke Statistics
| Total Jokes Submitted: | 83 | Live Jokes: | 17 | |
| Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates): | 66 | Duplicate Jokes: | 14 | |
| Average Joke Score (All Jokes): | 12.52 | Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted): | 61.12 | |
| Average Time Before Deletion: | 61,555m | |||
| Favourite Subcategory | Sex and shit > Paedophile (2) | |||
The best of stuart3455's 17 jokes (View All).
| Bomb disposal experts last night had to evacuate Lady Gaga's concert due to a suspicious package on stage. |
 
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So E-Harmony claim they can match you with other like-minded people, using comparisons on intellect and values. I have found this not to be true. I still cannot find an amputee midget hermaphrodite to shit in my mouth whilst I fist a badger. |
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"I only drink on special occasions" "What was the occasion?" "I was sober" |
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Joke
submitted by stuart3455, originally by Ed Byrne in Illness and mortality - Alcohol And Drugs - Added: 3 months ago - Current Score: 181.8
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Me "can you bring me a bottle of Cheval Blanc 2005, a Haut Brion 2003 and a Lafite Rothschild 1998" Wine waiter "Exquisite choice sir" "Oh and can you mix them up in a big jug with a straw?" |
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Joke
submitted by stuart3455, originally by Futurama in Illness and mortality - Alcohol And Drugs - Added: 2 days ago - Current Score: 131
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People are always complaining that football teams are changing their kits every season to make more money. It's not true. I bought my son an Arsenal scarf 7 years ago listing: League Champions (13) Premier League (4) FA Cup (10) League Cup (2) UEFA Cup (1) European Cup Winners' Cup (1) 7 years on and still up to date. |
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My sexy neighbour came banging on my door this morning. "Have you been stealing my underwear from my washing line???" "NO! how dare you, what do i want with your CLEAN underwear?" |
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Just saw the weather forecast, the presenter says "you will see a touch of frost this morning" I'll pick what i fucking watch, thank you. |
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| News Reporter:The Gadget Show's huge tech prize valued at over £7000 has sensationally tripled this week!!! When we called to ask Otis about this huge array of prizes a co-worker said he was unavailable to comment as he hadn't been in for three days |
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Just went to the supermarket and brought my weekly shop, as i was paying i asked £30 Cash back. "For the 50th time, no card, no cashback!" Cunts. |
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| Just read the warning label on a bottle of mouthwash. make sure your children spit and do not swallow...is this what we should be teaching our kids? |
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