• teh_ed's Statistics

    • User Level:
    • User
    • This Month's Leaderboard Points:
    • 0
    • Total Contribution Points:
    • 476
    • Total Joke Score:
    • 647
    • Total Time Active:
    • 101 hours, 22 minutes
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  • Joke Statistics

    • Total Jokes Submitted:
    • 62
    • Live Jokes:
    • 19
    • Total Deleted Jokes (including duplicates):
    • 43
    • Average Joke Score (All Jokes):
    • 10.44
    • Average Time Before Deletion:
    • 127,741m
    • Average Joke Score (Exc. Deleted):
    • 34.05
    • Duplicate Jokes:
    • 6

teh_ed's Jokes

A female friend of mine was telling me how her boyfriend had been beating her with his fists so often lately, that she had now developed a permanent long thin scar on her head.
Needless to say, after I heard this, I nearly pissed myself laughing.
She got angry and shouted at me, " IT'S NOT A JOKE, YOU FUCKING PRICK. IT'S SERIOUS!!"
So I replied, "Love, if you aren't joking, then why do you have a fucking punchline?"
In 10+ years of Joe Cole's professional career, he had not received a single red card. But after a few short weeks in Liverpool, he is already committing heinous acts of violence.

I honestly did not know being a Scouser was contagious.